Did anyone see this coming? We sure as hell didn’t. Walter Sobchak: should be a pushover.
Well, just like Walter Sobchak, the Green Bay Packers apparently braced the wrong kid. Little Larry = Arizona Cardinals.
I still don’t even know what to say. This shitball team came in with two wins. They came in with a rookie quarterback. They came in ranked last in every offensive category. If you want to talk about tanking in the NFL, then talk about this game.
The Cardinals won. They won in fucking Lambeau Field. So let’s get on with this. I will try not to mention how much Aaron Rodgers sucked, how he might have tanked, because I mentioned that enough after the loss.
Stack The Box
There have been times when Aaron Rodgers hasn’t been good. I’m going to point out the obvious here. Think about it. When have those times been? When he’s with some high-profile broad. Okay… coincidence? That would be odd, wouldn’t it? He’s could not be himself because he’s gay and is uncomfortable having a beard. And I don’t give a fuck if he’s gay or not. We have it on good authority he is. So what happens then from a game-planning perspective? Teams stack the box to stop the running game. Because Rodgers is off. They did it when Eddie Lacy was busting motherfuckers up and Rodgers wasn’t (Olivia Munn). They did it on Sunday, knowing Aaron Jones was busting motherfuckers up. And didn’t even care about Rodgers. They didn’t have to care. Maybe it’s not the woman thing or the pretend-woman thing, but defenses focus on stopping the other team’s biggest weapon. In this case, it was shut down Aaron Jones, not Aaron Rodgers. Very coincidental, though. Jones went 11 for 36 yards, his least-productive game of the year. Connect the dots.
Best Receiver In The League?
Davante Adams had the audacity to call himself the best receiver in the league last week. We laughed. Maybe shouldn’t have. I don’t know that he’s the best receiver in the league, but that touchdown catch where he dropped his toes and that sideline catch he had late? There are maybe five guys in the league that would make either of those plays. He made both of them. I think some shitdick called Adams a solid No. 3. Well, fuck that shitdick. Davante is a solid No. 1, one of the best receivers in the league. A No. 1 on any team. I can’t say he’s the best, but hell, he’s in the conversation as far as we are concerned.
Pass Rush? Hello?
We’ve been hearing about this great Mike Pettine defense all season, yeah? To me, that means maybe the Packers will get some pass rush and turnovers, no? The Packers had a whole two sacks on Sunday. A whopping three quarterback hits. Against a shit offensive line! Playing a rookie quarterback! One of the sacks came from safety Josh Jones. I mean, there’s no explanation. Did Pettine think he was going to get the interim job? He’s going to be looking for a job soon.
Unsung?
I’m not sure he’s an unsung hero, but Blake Martinez is a guy we love. He plays inside backer, so not recognized very often. But what the hell does this guy do? Just leads the team in tackles pretty much every week, We’re not talking about A.J. Hawk jumping-on-piles shit. We’re talking about actually making stops. Martinez is a boss. He’s the leader of the team’s defense. Other than Kenny Clark, might be the only ballin’-ass-motherfucker on it. And he deserves to be in the Pro Bowl.
Gravy Fart
You’re going to get no sappy obituary for Mike McCarthy here. Sorry if that’s what you wanted. But let’s give Fat Mike a little recognition for a second. Sure, he was propped up by two great quarterbacks and shit the bed in multiple NFC Championship games with said quarterbacks… totally outcoached in at least two of those games, but we should also point out the accomplishments of Mike McCarthy.
Guy had 125 wins. Second-most to Curly Lambeau in franchise history. Guy had a .618 winning percentage. We fucking win and he won. Unfortunately, he didn’t win like we need to win.
We may be an entitled bunch of pricks. And actually, we all know that’s the case. But we’re Green Bay Packers fans.
We better win every year, or at least know it’s close. We are not and will never be the Vikings. Thanks for winning that one year Mike, now where is someone who can win every year?