Slurping Shit in Foxboro: A Gut Wrenching Ordeal
Sunday night, the Green Bay Packers’ deficiencies were clearly exposed yet again. What makes it most painful is the number of juxtapositions between the Packers and New England Patriots; the differences that simultaneously make us superior and yet still fall way, way short.
I really hate the Patriots, for many different reasons and I am not alone. But the very thing I love the Packers the most for, our beautiful and elegant uniforms and our exemplary, classic oval G symbol is what I hate I about the Patriots. Their uniforms are ugly and that Flying Elvis looks like a bank logo. Not the logo of a great, historical team, but a fucking bank or maybe an insurance company. And it is this unsightly eyesore — this more vulgar picture — that we are bested by.
As much as any other reason, this is why the Packers should be the dynasty and not this insufferable band of pukes. Throw in the Packers history with Curly Lambeau and Vince Lombardi, and the consideration that there should not even be a franchise in a small town like Green Bay. Watching this travesty should turn anyone’s stomach.
Even more gut wrenching was the gushing, over-the-top praise for the Patriots that never stopped throughout the broadcast. It culminated in the most outrageous visual denoting Green Bay as the Titletown for the last century and Foxboro the Titletown for this century.
Worst of all, and this is truly a crime against all Packers fans, the opportunity to stop the Patriots or any other team from overtaking the Packers has all but passed. But it was an opportunity open to us for over 20 years: an opportunity now all but closed. As we all know, the Green Bay Packers have had two of the greatest quarterbacks back to back, with all but two championships to show for it. Shame and eternal shame!
The wasted seasons of 1997-98 and 2003-04 limited Brett Favre to just one championship and now the brain trust at 1265 Lombardi Avenue is wasting an even better quarterback in Aaron Rodgers. Both 2011 and 2014 were real opportunities that were squandered. And it seems clear now that the bad juju from the collapse in Seattle lingers on, with its nexus in Lance Easley and the Fail Mary. Mike McCarthy, in hindsight, ought to have been dismissed then, just as John Fox was dismissed from Denver after the disastrous Super Bowl loss. And of course it turns out that once Hall of Fame caliber general manager Ted Thompson had declined sharply in health in 2014. Many on the inside knew about it, but failed to act for three years. Now, general manager Brian Gutekunst is faced with the gargantuan task of compensating for three lost draft classes in his bid to build a roster capable of winning more championships in the latter half of Rodgers’ career.
In this same timeframe, the Patriots have won two more Super Bowls. Any chance of catching them is lost. If we are lucky they will win no further and the Packers will win one more equaling five overall, but Packers fans deserve better. We have better uniforms — our uniforms exude beauty, class, tradition and history. We have Lambeau Field. We have the tradition and history that is the groundwork on which the Packers are founded, without which a team could never exist in a town like Green Bay. But rather than return to this history and tradition of excellence of Green Bay Packers football, all of us are left to wonder what could have been.
All of this unpleasantness was made open and obvious for all to see, on national television, with talk of the Greatest of All Time, a new Titletown not in reference to our Green Bay Packers, but in reference to one of the most vile, ugly entities on the planet. Yet further shame and embarrassment heaped on TWO lost dynasties that were in the Packers grasp, but fleeted away.