Packers Do What They Need To Do, Dispatch Dolphins

45
Aaron Jones

Feels good to get that one out of the way doesn’t it? Its like you can breathe again. Green Bay Packers 31-12 over the Miami Dolphins.

Just like they were supposed to be.

And here’s the crazy thing. Gravy Head ran the goddam ball!

Aaron Jones. Fifteen carries, 145 yards. Two touchdowns. It’s like the world has ended.

I mean, this aggression will not stand, man!

Aaron Rodgers was not really great on this particular day. Hasn’t really been on all season. Gravy Fart finally did the right thing though. And the Packers’ defense showed up against a sub-standard quarterback in Brock Osweiler.

Six sacks and nine QB hits and none of those were made by any guys you would think other than Kenny Clark.

And after one of probably the worst games of his career, Bashaud Breeland showed up and looked like a dominant force. Maybe that will continue.

Maybe the Packers have something going.

They will need to have something going. The Packers go to Shittropolis to face a must-win against the Minnesota Stinkings if they would like to win the NFC North, next week.

Win that game and we’ll talk. Beat Osweiler’s Dolphins at home and I’ve got some CUTTY! for you.

Jay Cutler don't care


About The Author

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!

45 Comments on "Packers Do What They Need To Do, Dispatch Dolphins"

    • Empacador

      Details. mere details Howard. He sounds like the Packers are relevant after this game. That will last throughout the media until Thursday night, and then there will be 10 days of people shitting on and exiting the Packers bandwagon. Kyler Fackrell has as many sacks as Perry and Mathews combined. That’s how relevant the Packers are this season.

  1. TyKo Steamboat

    Nothing to celebrate here. Once again the Packers tried to beat themselves but the Dolphins, with Brock Ostweiler & without Ju’Wan James & Laramie Tunsil, somehow beat themselves more….

    SPECIAL TEAMS: We had a punt blocked? Terrible. Just disgusting & we still can’t seem to kick a team down into their red one. Who would have thought that special teams, roughing the passer penalties (which now aren’t called anymore), & fubles would lead to a 4-4-1 record after 9 games?

    The Dolphins were without their 2 starting tackles & Clay nor Perry can get it going. Speaking of Perry…Pussy left the game again. Looks like Tarzan, built like Jane. Also no Pussy Cobb. A 10 million $ contract & that Smurf has missed 5 games. At least that China Doll Bulaga finished the game. A miracle

    Time to focus quickly as we travel to South Alaska next & play those shit bags in Seattle. That has to be a ‘W’ & then it’s 10 days to prepare for the ViQueens. No excuses. It needs to be 6-4-1 in 14 days from now.

    • Empacador

      McCarthy is snake bit in Seattle. They are in his head. I suspect after the way the Seahawks lost today to the Rams, the Packers are going to end up paying for that.

  2. Larry

    Fucking McCarthy still doesn’t get it. Using play action on 2nd and two is acceptable but every week its a straight back drop and it rarely results in a first down completion. It’s madness. Just give Jones the ball. Very simple. Even after a win it’s the same frustration. Another thing I am sick of is the Rodgers animations when one of the rookie WRs does’nt read his mind. For 139 million dollars, sit down in a room with them for 8 hrs and FUCKING TEACH THEM!

    • PF4L

      Yea, i agree….he should ditch the disgusted look after a failed play, it’s getting old and isn’t a good look.

    • Don welsh

      Aaron Rodgers is an arrogant, egotistical twit who needs someone with stones to get in his face and kick him in the ass. Instead we got McCarthy who’s
      afraid to say anything! Just gonna go downhill from here.

    • Deepsky

      Rodgers no longer has Rodgers accuracy. This becomes more and more clear with every passing game. He’s still good, but he’s no longer got the arm he once had and I think this is affecting his decision making process. He is afraid to throw in traffic instead looking to get outside the pocket or holding on to the ball until guys come REALLY open.

  3. Skinny

    Rodgers deep throw accuracy now is just shit. I dont know what the hell happened. He either doesn’t throw the ball high enough so the receiver can go get it or the ball just isn’t a catchable ball to begin with. Its all quick outs and passes underneath. Might as well bring back the screen pass to complete the retro 90s west coast offense look they are going for. Jones is the best player on this team. Yeah I said it.

    • PF4L

      In the files of “for what’s it’s worth….”

      PFF had Rodgers graded at 99.5 of passes 10 yards or more downfield before the game.

      • Deepsky

        Everyone can see Rodgers is off. Stop defending him. In every game this season, he’s missed multiple open receivers. Too bad Rodgers isn’t as difficult on himself as he is his rookie receivers.

        • PF4L

          I do defend him, i also criticize him (see above). If i want to defend him in the future, i’ll be sure to come get your permission, would you like that?

          I look forward to reading your post on how Rodgers is finished, like you posted back in 2015.

          • Deepsky

            Well, I was wrong about that one, which made me believe he’s choosing to play below his level. Maybe that’s what’s going on now.

          • PF4L

            It’s hard to comprehend he chooses to play like shit, citing how competitive he is, and how important his legacy is.

            I’m guessing that knee bothers him more than he lets on, i don’t see him throwing off his right leg at all, especially when he rolls out, where he does his most damage. He almost always seems like he wants to get set to throw when he rolls out. That isn’t his game.

            The Queen game will tell us what we need to know about this Packer game, that’s (final) judgement day. For me anyway.

  4. Ferris

    I cannot understand why anyone cares that they beat Miami. This team has as much hope of a Super Bowl as the Cowboys. Translation NO CHANCE. Call me when McCarthy is not the coach and all of Ted’s mistakes are off the roster and when all the overpaid garbage is gone.

    • cz

      i think a lot of fans think this way.

      they “cleaned house” (capers and tt), but the captain didnt go down with that ship.. mm (cause we have a street named after him for 1 sb win after 15 yrs of 2 of best qbs that ever played)

      i agree with you… i do.

      lots of other coaches dont get that kind of untouchable treatment…

      the problem is, packer mgmt is so disconnected, they dont have another coach they can think of.

      kinda like how they hired an outside firm for our gm search…. but that money was wasted as they hired from within, which was the right decision in that case.

      • Cheese

        Right?? How stupid… Murphy hires an outside firm to assist them in finding a GM and they end up hiring in house. It was probably just a publicity stunt so Murphy didn’t have to take responsibility if the GM fucks up. Much like Murphy avoids responsibility for everything football related. Don’t worry, he’ll take full credit for that dumb fuck sledding hill though. Just what we needed!

  5. Kato

    Slightly packers related, but I wonder if Gase keeps his job? And if not, that he could beat target for the packers? I realize how bad the dolphins are, but I question how good of a coach he is. That offense does not look functional. I mean, Kyle Shannahan has kept his offense productive despite using second and third QBs

    • PF4L

      It’s hard to look functional with 3 starting lineman out, including your 2 tackles, keeping in mind their starting O line isn’t that good to begin with. Now stack that with a Brock Osweiller at QB and you have the recipe for the Packer defense to look ok.

      I’m just happy that…..

      THE PACK IS BACK!!

      • Kato

        Lol. Yeah I get that PF4L. Of course, you can ask yourself if Gase would be an upgrade over McCarthy. Which I would say probably yes. At least a bit. At least it would be fresh, unpredictable playcalling for a little while.

        • PF4L

          My account was hacked Yawa, and i’m not real fucking happy about it. I have the CIA working on this as we speak. Someone will be paying dearly for this. PF4L don’t play!!

  6. Kato

    Bahktiari had his worst game in a couple of years. I think Wake has always given Bahk issues if I remember right. Oh well, he gets a bit of a pass since he basically has played at an all pro level for 2.5 seasons now. Makes me wonder how TT failed so hard at essentially every draft pick for 3 years, but managed to find a star at possibly the second hardest position to fill on a football roster at LT.

    • Empacador

      A broken clock is right twice a day. A blind squirrel finds the occasional nut. Ted was our broken squirrel.

      • You have to admit TT also picked up Lang, Sitton, Linsley, and Tretter in the mid rounds. As often as that occurred either TT was very good at mid round o-line picks or Campen is an above average O line coach.

        • MJ

          Yes, he picked those guys, but over how many years? Clearly not often enough, since we faced a drop off in quality when Sitton and Lang left. When Ted found a solution to position X, then position Y lost some starters and was back to being a liability. A couple of years later he could get position Y fixed, but just in time for Z to have decayed. He wouldn’t bother going into a season with a glaring deficiency, as he wouldn’t even try to find adequate (not saying stellar) talent through FA.

        • Deepsky

          Campen is an above average coach. He’s been there a long time. I hope if they fire McCarthy, they do what they can to keep him.

    • PF4L

      Yea, i had the same thought Kato, but i thought Bahk had the worst game of his career last week. Like you, as i sometimes do with Rodgers, i give him a pass for past excellence.

      As far as TT finding this left tackle gem in the 4th round, even a broken clock is right twice a day. The law of averages my man. No offence Ted.

    • PF4L

      Goes to show he isn’t playing for the money i ‘m assuming, unless he gets lowballed and insulted. Sorry Gute, but that wasn’t your finest hour.

      I don’t blame him for wanting to get off that team as they tear it down and rebuild. Someone could probably get him for a 6th or 7th, if Jordy had a change of heart.

      • Kato

        I think he exited the last game with a knee injury, but ended up going back in. I mean the guy made a lot of money, and didn’t spend frivolously. His life is fairly simple, family and farming. Obviously he did care about football, but at this stage of his life, I think he knows he is basically done given the lack of FA interest. He would rather be with his family and do his farming in Kansas. I don’t blame him at all. I wish him all the best as possibly my favorite WR in Green Bay history.

    • Cheese

      Wow, couldn’t even last a whole season in Oakland. Not that I blame him with the shithole that situation has turned into. Cheers to Jordy!

      • Kato

        The situation is comical in Oakland. I still lol at the people that thought Gruden should come here. I had a really bad feeling for Jordy going there, especially when I saw them trade away Mack. Carr throwing the ball away on a 4th down yesterday says it all.

        • Cheese

          How bad does an environment have to be to where you don’t even want to stick around for another 7 weeks when you’re making $8 million a year? Tune out, lay low, go through the motions, do whatever until the end of the season. Not that Jordy needs the money but… damn. I saw an article on Yahoo saying that some unnamed veteran was heard saying that he “needs to get the f*#% out of there.”

          • PF4L

            As far as Jordy…By all accounts he is a Gold Star person in every aspect of life. I will always remember him as one of the special ones to don a Packer uniform. I couldn’t have anymore respect for the guy. It’s unfortunate the Packers did him how they did, there are a lot of players who deserve to be done like that, but Jordy Nelson is probably the last one.

            Well, at least they still have a young Randall Cobb…..smfh.

        • Kato

          A Jon Gruden quote: “I have always said that I believe in that kid,” Raiders coach Jon Gruden said. “In that fake punt you can see he is one of our fastest players. He is a tremendous athlete. He took his medicine for a while, like a lot of us, but he is going to be a really good punter for us.” This might be worse than any McCarthy quote, including his “pad level” comments. A punter doesnt have a place on a roster for being fast or an athlete. Sure, those are nice additional qualities, but the guy has to be able to punt, which apparently he has been poor at this year. I am sure some raiders fans are saying “cue the circus music.” That situation there is worse than here.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *