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Well, Packers Beat The Hell Out Of Toronto Argonauts

Who in the hell were the Green Bay Packers playing on Thursday night. Looked like the goddam Toronto Argonauts to me!

You gonna run Raghib Ismail out there to return some kicks?!

Apparently not. And that’s why my Notre Dame homer Shep would tell me the Packers beat down the Argos on this particular night.

Because no one could stop Ismail and the Golden Dome… except goddam Desmond Howard and his Heisman. Isn’t that right, homey!

Obviously, I don’t know what in the shit to say about the Packers’ first preseason game. More key regular season guys stand around in street clothes then actually step foot on the field.

Rodgers, Matthews, Graham, Bulaga, Perry.

Just some notables who were given the first preseason game off. And that’s fine.

Who gives a shit?

Well, of the actual starters who suited up, I can tell you Davante Adams gave a shit. Perhaps he’ll earn the massive contract! Two catches for 57 yards with a nice long of 48, delivered from — of all people — Brett Hundley.

But then again, Adams was the only guy Hundley could throw to in 2017. Couldn’t throw to Jordy. Couldn’t throw to Cobb. Couldn’t throw to anyone really, as evidenced by his zero touchdowns at Lambeau Field.

If Adams can play with Hundley, he deserves that contract.

Hundley does look somewhat better than last season. I’ll say that. I will also say, this is preseason. Vanilla defense. And Hundley has always looked good in preseason, when healthy.

Maybe the Packers can showcase him for a bit and flip him for a conditional seventh-rounder!

Score!

The only surprise to me was that DeAngelo Yancey was a No. 1 receiver with Adams. Randall Cobb didn’t do anything, but that just throws the whole stupid depth chart into chaos.

Let’s be short.

None of us give a shit about this game.

I liked Davante Adams. I liked Jamaal Williams. The cut he made on that TD catch — nice awareness, nice move. And Jake Kumerow — three for 75 and a touch, despite not catching the ball from AR.

Feel free to disagree.

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Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!

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17 Comments

  1. cz August 9, 2018

    Kumerow makes plays, but VScant outruns coverage and is tall, so he is a must starter.
    He spreads a D

  2. Empacador August 9, 2018

    McCarthy shouldn’t bitch about not having enough padded practices ever again. 1:42 left in the game so take a knee rather than work on the 2 minute drill. Brilliant!

  3. Disposable Hero August 10, 2018

    Rollins still sucks balls…

    1. PF4L August 10, 2018

      Yea he does..he’s like an accident waiting to happen.

    2. Icebowl August 10, 2018

      Dump him !

  4. Deepsky August 10, 2018

    Hundley had a 126 qb rating in the preseason in 2016. That’s 7 TDs and only 1 INT. I don’t trust anything I see from him anymore in preseason. I was surprised he was able to complete a pass over 20 yards, but even on that play he was locked onto Adams and has zero feel in the pocket. He looked the same to me.

    Kizer seemed to have a lot more feel in the pocket and a better arm. He also has some speed when he takes off which I think is a great asset for a backup QB. Boyle’s arm was a shocker, that guy has a a cannon. If the Packers get rid of either of these guys, they will be snapped up immediately.

    I hope that J’Mon Moore’s 4th round pick status doesn’t put him ahead of MVS in depth chart if MVS continues to have a spectacular preseason. If I were Yancey or Davis I wouldn’t unpack my bags that I just brought to training camp.

    1. Icebowl August 10, 2018

      Really liking MVS…. Looked good w 1/4back-ups…. News outta camp is he and QB1 have matched up well… Waits to be seen. Imo #12 gonna make Graham his new Jordy – not optimistic about Cobb and sad that TDavis never really worked out – the kid had amazing potential and SPEED…. Never got out of McFattys doghouse after the muffed kick return(s)
      Suspect he’ll end up w one of GBs farm teams (Detroit or Chi) after they cut him…

  5. Cheese August 10, 2018

    “Randall Cobb didn’t do anything”

    Surprise surprise… I still haven’t watched the game on DVR yet. Wisconsin Dells is more important than Brett Hundley.

    1. PF4L August 10, 2018

      It was probably because Cobb didn’t actually play in the game.

      As i’ve previously stated. these writers write articles about the Packer games, when they clearly didn’t even watch the game. Pathetic.

      In other Cobb news…..anyone see the man boobs on that dude?

      Holy shit!

      1. MJ August 11, 2018

        I hope you are kidding… No, I didn’t see him unshirted, but there is no way a guy with less than 10% body fat has man boobs. Or… he picked up a lot of bad weight. Or… his pecs are shaped very weirdly.

        1. PF4L August 12, 2018

          They showed him on the sideline, he had a shirt on but even still i was like….Damn!

  6. Cheese August 11, 2018

    Watching the game. Two fumbles in the first quarter so far by Hundley and Rollins. At least they were recovered. I see Pettine is taking the Dom Capers approach and sitting up in the booth. Not sure if that’s just because this is preseason or what.

    The announcer said he spoke to Kizer about his 22 interceptions from last year and asked if he would still throw those passes now. Kizer said yes he would make those throws again because he was confident he would complete them at the time. The announcer then said that’s a good thing because you don’t want a QB that isn’t confident and second guesses himself. WTF… I don’t care how confident he was at the time, he was obviously wrong in thinking he could make those throws. His false sense of confidence reminds me of Hundley, who played equally as bad last year. Now we have both of them.

    Other than the long pass to MVS, Kizer didn’t look good. I think he had more success running than passing. Hundley made some good passes but I don’t trust him for a second. Boyle looked good at times but also had his ups and downs. Does the coaching staff dare keep Boyle over the other two guys? Do they keep 3 QB’s? The drama of preseason continues…

      1. Cheese August 11, 2018

        Hmm, I thought he was supposed to be the sideline hype man. Something this defense hasn’t had since Kevin Greene.

        1. Howard August 11, 2018

          I also thought Pettine would be on the sideline. I understand that Patrick Graham is a hard ass, intense, Kevin Greene type. Graham will probably be on the sideline impersonating Sgt. Hulka’s big toe. That big toe is needed and I think Pettine will make sure there is a big toe on the sideline for the defense.

          1. PF4L August 12, 2018

            So if it’s a better view, why don’t all the coaches go up there? Isn’t that logical?

            I really don’t have any thoughts whether a head coach should go up in the booth. Maybe when we get one i’ll have something to say about it. For now, one of our offensive coordinators can go up there. No one likes eating hot dogs alone.

          2. Cheese August 12, 2018

            Apparently we have four head coaches on staff, just none of them fill the actual position.