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Aaron Rodgers

These Go Up To 11 For Aaron Rodgers

It is one of my favorite moments in a movie of all time. Why not just make 10 louder? But these go up to 11.

Yes, they do.

And they are one louder.

Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers missed most of last season after he was body-slammed by perennial piece of shit, Anthony Barr, who personifies the Minnesota Vikings. Well, apparently AR has an 11 setting, which we totally welcome.

“This year, it’s (last year’s ‘revenge tour’) taken up to 11, past 10,” defensive lineman Mike Daniels said, laughing. “It’s going to get pretty ugly for some defenses out there.”

Why not just make 10 louder?

Because 10 isn’t enough. We’re cranking this shit up to 11, just for the Stinkings. They will pay, as they should. Not only will they pay in having an empty trophy case. Not only will they pay as a franchise that hangs division title banners while we laugh at them. But they will pay at the hands of the only elite quarterback in the NFC North.

Kirk Cousins. Welcome aboard. The Green Bay Packers are going to fuck you right in the mouth.

Two games with the Vikings? I’ll be generous. Total outcome: 753 to 3, Packers.

But feel free to call me when you actually win a game that counts, suckbags. I’d send my maid over to dust your trophy case as a courtesy, but you don’t fucking have one.

These go up to fucking 11.

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Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!

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4 Comments

  1. TyKo Steamboat June 11, 2018

    This was like a bad pep-rally minus the Mike Daniels quote

    1. PF4L June 13, 2018

      A Mike Daniels quote is usually the kiss of death. Who would be shocked if we get swept? I don’t care what anyone thinks, the queens team is no joke, unless they get to a NFCCG.

      It’s all fun and games till someone gets punched in the mouth.

  2. KILLER June 11, 2018

    Sick stuff. Injuries happen people. Especially when your QB does not follow coaching on how to take a hit and land (hint: don’t use your throwing arm to cushion your fall).

  3. PF4L June 12, 2018

    How does a team advance to a Super Bowl played in their in own State, at their own Stadium?
    A) Win a NFCCG
    B) Don’t shit the bed during the game.
    C) Don’t give up 6 minutes into the game.
    D) Don’t play like you are out of your league (even if you are).
    E) Make sure you don’t play for the Minnesota vikings

    HINT: There maybe more than one correct answer.