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Atlanta Falcons’ New Stadium Resembles a Butthole

The Green Bay Packers will travel to face the Atlanta Falcons on Sunday night. However, this will be no usual Sunday night, at least not for the Falcons.

They will be opening their new stadium, which for some reason Mercedes-Benz put their name on. I say “for some reason” because maybe Mercedes didn’t notice that this stadium looks like a butthole.

“The Best Or Buttholes.”

Here. Go ahead and take a look at their fancy butthole.

That’s slick. Do you think they lube it up before operation?

I’ve heard the butthole will be open on Sunday night. As Shawn pointed out in the podcast, that means this will be the first outdoor football game played in Atlanta since the Falcons played at Fulton County Stadium.

Many of the Packers have suggested that the place will likely be “rocking.” But remember, these are Falcons fans we’re talking about. Falcons fans suck.

I mean, when Samuel L. Jackson is the best celebrity fan you have to offer, you know the fanbase sucks. What’s in your butthole?

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Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!

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11 Comments

  1. Howard September 15, 2017

    Why would they lube it up? Did they lube up Blank, the taxpayers, or the paying fans, before they spent 1.6 billion (or more).

    As Pinkley (AKA number 2, fitting for the stadium look) would have said, in part. ” Very pretty, Colonel, Very pretty, But, Does it work?

  2. KILLER September 15, 2017

    Yes, to Mordecai/PF4L/Monty, anything round or circular looks like a butt hole. Why? That is what he thinks about 24/7. Why do you think he likes Aaron Rodgers so much? They think alike.

    I’d also like to note that if he thinks the stadium looks like a butt hole… what is going on with his butt hole? Does he have a bionic butt hole he looks at with a little hand mirror? Let’s just call PF4L BBH from now on.

    What is with this eagerness to criticize stadiums of opposing teams? Called the new Vikings stadium ugly when everyone else sees striking beauty. This is just plain jealousy. And displacement. Packers have, literally, the worst stadium in the NFL. High School style seating along with Saudi Arabian Sheik pricing at confession stands. Bad combo.

    Packer backers calling other stadiums ugly is sort of like the guy with the profoundly homely wife calling the super model you married ugly.

    1. Kato September 15, 2017

      And you still have the maturity of of a ten year old. Why you continue to go on rival teams message boards, I have no clue. Your homophobia and obsession with Aaron Rodgers sexuality are nothing short of stunning.

      1. KILLER September 15, 2017

        Sure, comment on my lack of maturity when I respond to an article comparing a stadium to a butt hole. Care for some hypocrisy anyone?

        I like to point out the actual truth when it is being kept from or obscured. This site works hard to make Aaron Rodgers look heterosexual. If he was heterosexual and they were making him look like he was homosexual then I would do the opposite. So, what you see from me actually reflects on the site’s deceptive content. Since they are trying to hide it they are actually the homophobic ones. Get it? If not, re-read my post very slowly.

        1. Kato September 15, 2017

          https://www.google.com/amp/deadspin.com/megatrons-butthole-to-remain-clenched-1797265016/amp

          Mordecai is far from the first one to make this comparison. In fact, other football fans have made this comparison, including vikngs fans. So don’t make this a “packers fan type of thing.” Besides, you should know better, Mordecai has no original thought when it comes to his “journalism.”

          Second, you keep bringing up Aaron Rodgers sexuality as an insult, even if there is no basis for it in the conversation, like this one about the falcons stadium supposedly resembling an orfice. You have no idea what Aaron Rodgers sexual preference is, you have zero proof. Would it surprise me if he was gay? Yeah, maybe a bit, but it wouldn’t completely surprise me. Maybe he is bisexual? Who gives a shit either way, he has owned the NFC North. And is one of the top five QBs of all time most likely.

          1. KILLER September 15, 2017

            Just because Mordecai is not the first does not make it not immature. Poor grammar but I think you’ll get it. This site is into 1) Deception, and 2) Insults laced through its occasional journalism. Those are the calling cards of this site. They give it personality. Yes, a bad personality but, still, an identity such as it is.

            When it comes ot insulting, anti-gay, homophobic, gay-bashing, and using gayness as an insult, the posters on this site (not including me) are A#1 Kings of that. You can find it quickly and easily in just about every other article (in the posts).

            I like to point out Rodgers’ nature to sort of poke you Packer backers living in your bubble world of self-delusion. The insult is not people being gay, it is the writers at this site trying to conceal it such as with all these articles about who he is dating or having sex with when he has not. As far as you “gives a shit” as you poetically put it, the writers and self-deluders on this site obviously do and they are trying hard to deny it. What I “gives a shit” about is not homosexuality — it is, rather, the truth that I care about.

            Lots of people don’t like to hear the truth. They would rather be ignorant. If you are one of them, just don’t read my posts. Simple!

          2. PF4L September 15, 2017

            Enough, is a fucking nuff….ok people?…chill the fuck out.

            I am getting sick and fucking tired of people in here hurting other peoples feelings, this is what is driving this Country apart. Just stop already.

            Now Mordecai, apologize to the queen fan for calling the queens new stadium ugly. And queen fan, apologize to Kato for being the world’s biggest D-bag.

            Don’t make me have to come back in here.

            Thank you for understanding.

  3. Cheese September 15, 2017

    Apparently the Mercedes Benz Superdome in NOLA wasn’t enough? Pretty soon we’re gonna have the Mercedes Benz NFC South.

  4. PF4L September 15, 2017

    Lmao….When i saw the title of this article, i just said “Mordecai” before i clicked into it.

  5. PF4L September 15, 2017

    Fk’n Mordecai, lol, your killin me…..He should be writing ads for Proctoligist.

    “What’s in your butthole?”

  6. Empacador September 15, 2017

    “Jules” would like to have a word with you, Mordecai.

    “There’s a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. “The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy My brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay My vengeance upon you.” Now… I been sayin’ that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, that meant your ass. You’d be dead right now. I never gave much thought to what it meant. I just thought it was a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker before I popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin’ made me think twice. See, now I’m thinking: maybe it means you’re the evil man. And I’m the righteous man. And Mr. 9mm here… he’s the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you’re the righteous man and I’m the shepherd and it’s the world that’s evil and selfish. And I’d like that. But that shit ain’t the truth. The truth is you’re the weak. And I’m the tyranny of evil men. But I’m tryin’, Ringo. I’m tryin’ real hard to be the shepherd.”