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Ted Thompson will Be Going Senile As Packers’ GM as Long as He Likes

We’ve all witnessed Green Bay Packers general manager Ted Thompson’s decreasing mental capacity. We’ve posited that the team is now likely drafting by committee — with Eliot Wolf and Brian Gutekunst heavily involved. We have prayed for the day Thompson finally exits stage left.

But there are clearly only three things certain in life at this point. Death, taxes and Ted Thompson being the GM of the Green Bay Packers.

Our old pal Ginger Gap Tooth, who, frankly, we wouldn’t doubt is sleeping with Thompson at this point, says Big Ted will be Big Ted as long as Big Ted wants.

“Ted and I, we have a great relationship. As long as he wants to continue to work, and he’s still doing a good job — and I think he still does a great job for us — we want him to continue to be our general manager,” Murphy said. “At a point he decides he doesn’t want to do it anymore for whatever reason, then we would do a search.”

I wonder which one is the top and which one is the bottom.

Sorry for putting that image in your mind.

Who will the Packers’ next GM be and when will that glorious day finally arrive? Mum is the word.

GGT says the Packers will do a search, which shows zero public commitment to any of the in-house candidates. We would be very surprised if the Packers went outside of the organization for the hire, however.

Although former Kansas City Chiefs GM and Thompson protege John Dorsey has been mentioned, things didn’t end well for him in KC.

We currently consider his hire unlikely, unless he were to come back under Thompson.

But hell, this is all moot. Ted Thompson is going to outlive you, me and everyone else. He’ll be a damn zombie and still GM of the Packers.

Oh, wait. That’s already the case.

And for the record, I think Ted is the top in that combo.

Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!



  1. Howard July 13, 2017

    I would not read to much into the term “search” for finding a new GM. I believe the Rooney rule applies for senior football operation open positions. A team could be fined if they did not follow the Rooney rule when hiring a new head coach or senior football operation position.

  2. GBORNBRED July 13, 2017

    Wasn’t the least bit surprised to read these comments from Mark Murphy, especially after reading what was reported on this site yesterday about the Packers having another record year in terms of revenue. Revenue is all Murphy is really accountable for, and as long the money keeps rolling in, he’s not going to feel the need to rock the boat, nor will he be pressured to do so by the Packers Board of Directors.

    Translation, you ask? You can look forward to seeing that deer in the headlights look in Ted Thompson’s face, as he remains the Packers GM for years to come.

  3. Bobby D July 13, 2017

    People talking about Rodgers playing till he’s 45. That means the mentally challenged fruitcake will have to be straw fed for the next 12 years. Howdy Doody Murphy would be the logical candidate to keep sticking something cylindrical in the white rat’s pie hole. Anyone of sound mind knows the guy should be institutionalized, but all dickhead Murphy wants is a solid bottom line…fuck the fact this dick licker has minimized the career’s of two HOF qb’s. Pathetic!!

  4. Abe Frohman July 14, 2017

    How many times do we hear that double speak from the front office of all franchises? What Murphy says is meaningless. Ted’s contract is up at the end of this year and he’s talked about retiring. That means more to me than anything else.