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Packers Take Bears’ Garbage, Ego Ferguson

Who’s making moves? Big Ted is making moves!

And his latest move is latching onto some of the Chicago Bears’ refuse.

Namely, defensive lineman Ego Ferguson.

While he’s got the name, he might as well be called Turd Ferguson, because that’s what he is. A turd.

The Chicago Bears don’t just release guys for fun. Their whole football organization sucks a fat turd, in case you weren’t aware. So in order to get released by a turd, you have to be a complete turd.

Enter, Turd Ferguson.

On the bright side, Turd Ferguson was once a second-round pick by the Chicago Turds. Thus, at some point, someone saw something in Turd.

Now, Big Ted will try to see something in him.

And basically, that will go like this.

Hey, Fat Mike, I just claimed this Turd from the Chicago Bears. Now go out and make something of him that doesn’t belong in the toilet!

Here’s the lowdown.

Didn’t play in a game in 2016. Has been suspended for PEDs, which will make him fit right in with the Packers! Played in only four games in 2015, with just one start (the only one of his career). Played in 16 games in 2014, but didn’t start any of them. Ferguson has 26 career tackles and two sacks.

We’ll say this. His story has been one of injuries and dumbassery. If he can stay healthy, then he’s probably a guy who will wreck the Chicago Turds twice a year.

And that’s fine.

I’ll pay $900,000 for that.

Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!



  1. Kato April 3, 2017

    So apparently he was played the wrong way in Chicago. He was drafted to be a 3 technique and when Fangio was brought in he was no longer a fit.

  2. Howard April 3, 2017

    He is a camp body if he even passes the physical.

  3. PF4L April 3, 2017


    The defense is fixed…..Fuck yea….Rock on Ted.

    Ted’s gonna kill it in the draft, and were on our way BABY!!

    We’re gonna wreck the NFC NORTH, Then were gonna wreck the NFC Conference in the playoffs….Then were gonna wreck Belichick and Brady at Super Bowl LII Feb. 4th.

    Full Disclosure: My therapist wants me to try more positive thinking to see if that curbs any of my Packer angst…so, how am i doin?

    1. Kato April 3, 2017

      Solid. Have you tried writing TT letters of support? That might help. Maybe erect a monument of him in your yard?

      1. eduardo April 4, 2017

        Shouldn’t be hard to erect a cement dildo.

    2. icebowl April 4, 2017

      P., give me the name of your shrink.
      Thinking I might need one when season starts.

      Wanna make sure I don’t use yours, he/she obviously ain’t doing it.  Sorry bro

      1. PF4L April 5, 2017


  4. Bobby D April 3, 2017

    Don’t say erect in a TT thread..he just may be reading all this. He’ll get all excited and start cruising the gay bars looking for more talent

    1. Kato April 3, 2017

      My bad. Although if those gay bars have any kind of interior offensive line, corner, or pass rushing talent I don’t give a damn, sign them. Although TT might be looking for different talent….

  5. Ferris April 3, 2017

    Man… Turd Ferguson that was some funny SNL stuff. Get him a big foam cowboy hat.

    1. Kato April 3, 2017

      You’re an asswipe. Heh heh, pardon my French

  6. Kato April 3, 2017

    So this is a low risk, potentially decent reward signing. The packers aren’t out any money if he doesn’t make the 53. On the bright side, he was a second round pick, and was apparently a decent run defender. If he stays healthy he could be a pretty good two down/goal line defensive lineman. To me, this lessens the need to grab a defensive lineman early on. Too bad they still need a guard, running back, OLB, and cornerbacks.

  7. Jschizl April 3, 2017

    Most signings I can ever remember. Lots of Hungary veterans. Pleased with change of policy. Tone setter Bennet on offense. Will be a fun year. We haven’t had a tone setter like him since woodson. Tight ends that will disguise run or pass.
    When we win the super bowl this year in Minnesota. How epic will that be to overtake that city. Seeing there fans have to watch green bay in super bowl in minnesota.
    Maybe some thugs like mixon and some sub 4.3 guys. I don’t want choir boys like these writers. There’s two sides to every story. Eugene Robinson made it happen back in the day. I don’t care what they do in there offseason.
    Secondary will be a little better. Adams had a sophomore slump. Turned it aroundthis year.
    My only complaint is Donny Barclay who is he related to

    1. Kato April 4, 2017

      I will take whatever you are drinking

    2. icebowl April 4, 2017

      “Lots of Hungary veterans….”.?
      I didn’t know Eastern Europe was an option for football talent… better let TT know asap…..

      Induljunk Packers !!!

      1. icebowl April 4, 2017

        Megy Pack Megy !

  8. ? Furgeson April 4, 2017

    Don’t y’all be talking shit about me Najeh

    1. icebowl April 4, 2017

      Right down to the emoji

  9. KILLER April 4, 2017

    “Has been suspended for PEDs, which will make him fit right in with the Packers!”


    1. PF4L April 5, 2017

      What makes players fit right in on the queens team? Owning a boat? Raping strippers? Having the name williams and getting busted for PED’s, then spending the players millions trying to fight it, then losing anyway? Needing supervision from CPS to see your illegitimate children?

      The #1 reason a player would fit perfectly on the vikings team….having no history of winning.

      Killer: “When a team starts 5-0, the odds of winning the SuperBowl increase to …….”

      PF4L: “Bwahahahahahahaha”

  10. Deepsky April 5, 2017

    Bears have had a lot more PED suspensions since 2010 than the Packers. Surprisingly, the Vikings, tops on the list for the last 30 years, have only had a couple.

    Anyway, Ferguson will be gone before the season starts. The Packers were probably going to take him in the second, but the Bears got to him first, so now they want to take a look at him and see where they went wrong.