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Good Riddance, Phil Simms!

Boy, have I been waiting a long time to say that. The day when CBS cans Phil Simms as the color man from their No. 1 broadcast team will be a joyous occasion.


Because Phil Simms IS THE FUCKING WORST!

Yes, I am aware that many of you have an irrational hatred for Troy Aikman and Joe Buck. They’re actually fine, though. Phil Simms is the least-insightful moron to ever set foot in the booth. You just don’t realize it because CBS doesn’t get a lot of Green Bay Packers games.

We can all at least be thankful for that.

It appears CBS has finally seen the light. They have a plan to replace Phil Simms and that plan is Dallas Cowboys quarterback Tony Romo.

Of course this is no done deal. Romo is still a member of the Cowboys and he still may end up playing somewhere this season. That would likely relegate us to more Simms.

The other wild card here is, if Romo went to the booth, do we even know if he’d be any good?

I have two things to say about that. One, it isn’t possible that he could worse than Simms. Two, he’s from Wisconsin, so he would obviously be awesome.

Personally, I would probably like to see Romo give it one more run with the Texans or some other playoff contender, but CBS needs to make this happen at some point.

Even if it isn’t Romo, put Phil Simms out of his misery.

Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!



  1. NachoDan March 30, 2017


  2. Kato March 30, 2017

    In interviews with Romo, I always thought he seemed fairly well spoken. I think he would be decent.

    1. PF4L March 30, 2017

      He’d do ok, but as a color guy, he seems “too” nice. You have to have a color man that goes by the mindset…I’m calling the game the way i see it…deal with it, it’s my job. Like Aikman and Collinsworth. Gruden is ok, but he is so over the top in his love for some players, usually B or C level QB’s, it’s enough to make ya ill.

      Some won’t like this…but i can’t stand listening to Kevin Harlan and Rich Gannon call a game, it’s infuriating. They don’t dissect plays, rarely call who got flagged, and when they do point out players, it seems like 20-25% of the time they call the wrong players name.

  3. Bobby D March 30, 2017

    If it was true, it would be good news, not only because he sucks in the booth, but also because he’s smug douchebag that thinks he’s hot shit. They should get rid of him on Inside the NFL before the playmaker sexually abuses him
    And on the subject of is true? Of course not! Why? Because its was reported by the same Ian Rappoport that broke the story last year about our gay fruitcake GM going all in on free agency. Both Ian and Ted both blow!!
    Room will play this year….there, I just broke a story. Let’s see who’s right

  4. TyKo Steamboat March 30, 2017

    Best news ever… the worlds worst broadcaster
    thank GOD!!!
    he was the WORST!