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Within the building, the Green Bay Packers’ brass is pushing the “it’s time for Damarious Randall and Quinten Rollins to step up” rhetoric.

However, the fact of the matter is, both players were abject failures in their second seasons after promising rookie campaigns. The trouble started when Sam Shields went down in week 1. That thrust Randall into the No. 1 corner spot, a job he wasn’t prepared for or good at. Injuries also forced Rollins out of his customary slot position to the outside, a role he couldn’t handle (although he didn’t handle the slot well either).

Shields isn’t coming back to… ahem… shield Randall and Rollins’ shortcomings in 2017.

The one Packers’ cornerback who did perform well at times in 2016 was LaDarius Gunter. Where Gunter failed was when the Packers decided to leave him one-on-one with some of the NFL’s top receivers. Up-and-down would be the best way to describe Gunter’s season. Just look at the playoffs. He shuts down Odell Beckham Jr. and then gets torched by Dez Bryant and Julio Jones in successive weeks.

We still like Gunter, but he needs to be an outside No. 2, a role where he’d be very solid.

The fact of the matter is, despite their lofty draft status — Randall was a first-round pick and Rollins a second-rounder — no one really has any idea what the Packers have in Randall and Rollins. Including, it seems, the Packers.

We could see one or both of them bounce back from their truly pathetic seasons like receiver Davante Adams did in 2016. They could also end up being busts.

Word on the street is, the Packers aren’t going to leave it up to chance (thank god).

Draft analyst Tony Pauline is reporting that the Packers are going to add more bodies at the position.

I asked a trusted source at the Green Bay Packers which direction they were moving towards free agency and the draft. His response? “Corners, lots of them.”

Pauline’s name isn’t instantly recognizable, but around this time last year, he reported that the Packers were looking to upgrade at left tackle. That turned out to be true. The Packers went and drafted Jason Spriggs in the second round.

In turn, David Bakhtiari started playing his ass off and earned himself a fat new contract. We’re not sure where Spriggs fits anymore, but that’s a discussion for a later date.

That calls into question the motivation of the leak. Did the Bakhtiari rumor get planted because the Packers wanted to motivate Bakhtiari? If it did, we can assume the point of this rumor is to motivate Randall and Rollins.

But why then bring in bodies that may never see the field?

For one, it’s added motivation for the underperforming player. Two, you’re hedging your bets in case that player doesn’t get the message. Three, you can never have enough quality football players. As we all know, the Packers may as well rename themselves the Bellin ICUs with all the injuries they have year after year after year.

To that last point, you shore up your most important positions: quarterback, left tackle, cornerback and, in theory, defensive line.

Perhaps we’re getting too far down the rabbit hole here. I mean, we’re giving the Packers’ front office an awful lot of credit in this scenario. When you take a step back and think about them potentially being so shrewd and calculating, it’s good for a chuckle.

But then, you’re probably picturing the chucklehead at the top, Ted Thompson. If you look slightly lower on the totem pole to a guy named Wolf, it might not be so far-fetched.

Joseph Bonham

Joseph is a fiction writer when he isn't doing this. In his spare time he likes to do manly things like drink beer and procreate.



  1. Cheese February 9, 2017

    If Thompson and Capers are still here after the 2018 season, I give up. Every year since SB45 I at least have a little bit of hope something could happen. Even after Seattle. Not anymore. Same shit every year. Nothing changes. Never will. Not with limp dick Ginger Gap Tooth. Status quo until the end, which is when Rodgers retires and their paycheck stops.

  2. Don Trask February 10, 2017

    Thank you Captain Obvious. They should revert back to Ron Wolf’s standards at CB, a height requirement of at least 6 feet, 6’2″ is better

    Then update that standard to include 4.5 speed. I don’t think any of current starters meet that .

    1. Empacador February 10, 2017

      To be fair, Wolf had to learn that lesson the hard way. After all, Wolf drafted the 5’10” Terrell Buckley rather than the hometown Wisconsin hero Troy Vincent, who was 6’1″ and had a much more successful NFL career. I don’t think this current regime knows what the words adapt or improvise mean.

  3. PF4L February 10, 2017

    When it’s all said and done…..Rodgers will be gone, the 3 stooges will be gone, and it will be the fans still here supporting this team. In the years to come, we will then have a regular run of the mill team fighting for a playoff spot. The “casuals”(fans) will “then” begin to understand the opportunities missed under Rodgers. Something us knowledgeable fans have known for a small handful of years already.

    Mark my words,Venom will be spewed over this team under achieving while Rodgers was here, once the masses come to terms with that reality. The boo’s will be reigning down heavy at Packer home games like snow at Lake Gogebic.

    So you may ask….Why do you say that PF4L?

    2 reasons…1) By the time Rodgers retires 2020-2021 i’m guessing. The Packers will have had 2 franchise QB’s constantly for almost 3 decades. Think about that…How many teams ever even come close to that? None, zero.
    What will we have to show for it, 2 Super Bowl wins? Brett fucking Favre, and Aaron fucking Rodgers for 30 years, and 2 SB’s? That’s a fucking joke.
    2) Packer fans, especially people that only became Packer fans from the early 90’s on. They don’t know anything other than what they’ve seen. A winning franchise. But Lord oh Lord, after the Favre, Rodgers era. Those Packer fans are going to be like wtf?… when/if this team records sub .500 seasons and a lot of those fans will slowly regress to being non- Packer fans simply because they aren’t winning, when winning is all they know.
    Fans that are lets say 40 and older will be all too familiar with Packers seasons of 4-12, 6-9, an occasional 8-8, or 9-7. These are the fans intelligent enough to appreciate having 2 franchise QB’s back to back for so long. To put that in perspective. Some teams have never had a franchise QB, ever. They don’t grow on tree’s. So what are the odds the Packers get a 3rd one in a row? Buy a Powerball ticket, and read the back of the ticket and you’ll have your answer.

    Favre’s skill set places him in the top 10 QB’s of all time. Rodger’s places him in the top 5. 2 SB’s in almost 30 years?

    You can puff out your chest of the Packers winning percentage. You can tell the world how successful you are….But when you win only 1 of 4 NFCCG’s….you failed mother fucker!!

    1. Kato February 11, 2017

      Yeah, its too bad when your best player plays like crap in those NFC championship games

  4. Empacador February 10, 2017

    Imagine if the Holmgren had Rodgers first. And then we were “blessed” with Favre after. Fans might be a little bit more conscientious and concerned since the difference in play between the QBs is noticeable. Instead the QB play improved enough that guys running the team now have made their careers by hedging their bets. Favre had better coaching and teams his first 7 years with the Packers. Too many fans look at the backups the Packers have had during Favre-Rodgers and think the Packers will simply pull another guy out and insert him into the lineup and success will come naturally. Those poor, poor fools.