Welcome to Your Worst Nightmare

48
Aaron Roders going down

Seriously, what could be worse than the Green Bay Packers losing to the Minnesota Vikings? Well, let me tell you!

The Packers can come out and embarrass themselves, completely shit their pants on offense and not even let their defense, whom we expected to carry the day, carry the day.

Why was that?

Because Mike McCarthy — BUFFOON — his offense sucked. That Buffonish offense has sucked for a while. The rest of the NFL is on to your Buffoonish tricks, but will you change them?

NO!

ICH DOST MCCARTHY! SIE MUSSENE SICH BEUGEN!

I couldn’t even give a fuck. I couldn’t even give a fuck about how much Mike McCarrthy and his gravy-filled head is an issue.

Good play calling?

Sure! Let’s call some plays!

The Green Bay Packers — the team that we know — was a joke on Sunday Night Football.

N0t 0n Sunday afternoon football. Not on late afternoon football. Not on Monday night, where the joke of the Chicago Bears plays. On Sunday Night Football.

Our team. A disgrace!

We totally held Adrian Peterson in check.

Their team rushed for 30 total yards. That was 1.4 yards per carry. The Packers’ rushing defense did its job. What didn’t do its job — or who didn’t do his job, at least defensively, is pretty much one person.

Let’s not bullshit. Damarious Randall lost the Green Bay Packers this game.

That fuckface looked like he was stoned half the time. When he wasn’t giving up big plays… wait… he was always giving up big plays!

Realistically, an awesome defense — which the Packers clearly don’t have — needs to step up when your offense is a total piece of shit, such as anything helmed by Mike McCarthy.

The Packers just lost to the fucking shitbag Queens 17-14.

That’s a joke,which is exactly what this team is.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

48 Comments on "Welcome to Your Worst Nightmare"

  1. Big B

    Sam Bradford, with a week and a half to learn a new offense and who his teammates are, far outplays Mr Rodgers. WTF. Something is rotten in the state of Wisconsin. Our offense continues to be ineffectual, if anything worse than last year’s landfill tire fire- needs a critical look from GM down. McCarthy has passed the “best used by date”. This team is regressing any way you look at it.

  2. GB West

    You got that shit right Monty! It’s ten o’fuck on the west coast and I’m the first to comment on that F”N piece of shite debacle I just witnessed! Wow! What a joke.

    • When your offensive coordinator wants to prove to all that he is not a conservative play caller, and the head coach doesn’t remind him it is his responsibility to call plays. It is the head coaches responsibility to determine when to chase invisible points when actual points are in hand. Jekyll and Hyde.

  3. MJ

    Like a magnetic pole reversal. An offense that regularly put 30 points on the board, has now forgotten what a first down is. A defense that used to get slashed by the run, now limits one of the best RBs to 1.4 yards per carry. A defense that was able to produce turnovers, gets burned by unknown WRs and a QB that just has two weeks in his new system. A once clinically accurate Rodgers, now overthrows his guys in half the throws. The defense conceded 17 points, having spent quite some time on the field. Not much more can be demanded from them, aside from some improvement in the CB department. No, it’s the offense that does not surprise anyone, and the coaching staff that is unable or unwilling to make adjustments (eg, for some reason still giving Adams chance after chance after chance, when he does more harm than good).

  4. MJ

    That front seven stood their ground after losing Guion (Clark, Ringo) and without Pennel. Also liked the kid Martinez.
    Oh, and as a friend said, “Randall got so burnt that when the player he was supposed to cover gets tackled, he is actually tackled by someone else”.

  5. Predicted a loss here and I was right. It’s nice to be vindicated and to continually show how right i am about this regime being overrated from top to bottom. While the Vikings were busy stockpiling championship caliber defensive talent, we are overpaying our home boys and relying on half the team built on undrafted free agents! Woo hoo way to save those pennies for a rainy day you stupid fucks! Hey, it’s only week 2 but has this offense looked like anything remotely resembling a powerhouse since we choked away a Championship game to the SEACHICKENS?

  6. icebowl

    Secondary, in particular as you pointed out – Randall looked like the Keystone Kops as Bradford-Diggs ran them wild.
    Capers’ D achieved goal of shutting down AP (even possibly ending his career), but should’ve recognized early that plan to dare Bradford to throw hoping he’d be ineffective wasn’t working. Changes needed to be made at in the locker room at the half.
    QB1 looked as rusty as in game 1, missing timing on throws that would’ve been completions two years ago….
    Turnovers were the killers, they’re luck at recovering fumbles had to eventually run out – and it did at the wrong time.
    O-line was best part of offense, followed by Jordy – where was Lacy for most of the game ? Receiving corps can’t be top notch if they can’t get catchable passes.
    Hoping they can get on track v. Butterball and the Kittens next week – though you can bet they’ll be studying the game films all week and target Randall…..

    BTW Monty : Stick to writing in English –
    A standard Bavarian curse – “Himmeherrschaftszeitensacklzementgreizgruzifixscheissglumpvarreckts” would be more fitting ….

  7. Chad Lundberg

    What stands out more than anything is how Aaron Rodgers looks nowhere near the same player he used to be. He’s inaccurate and looks discombobulated. It took until week 4 in 2014 for the Packers to get their shit together, but it’s disconcerting to see Rodgers playing this way. How many overthrown passes has he had? 4-5 in this game alone. Hopefully this will all fucking blow over, but they have GOT to step it up already. And I know I’m in the minority here, but my GOD I can’t wait until Shields comes back.

    • ab

      Issue is, there has more or less been the same talk since week 4 or 5 last year. We just need a more diverse offensive plan than try and get huge pass interference calls and then get Rodgers in a scramble drill. Also you can’t tell me that’s not the game plan because it happens every week.

  8. Empacador

    I watched McCarthy’s presser live. “12 play drive, offense had the advantage, my call.” There aren’t enough expletives left to describe what piece of work he is. Anybody that thinks he is a good coach after watching this debacle is not watching the same games. I guess in the world of Mike McCarthy, this is what constitutes “growth”.

    In the Seattle NFC meltdown, he couldn’t kick enough field goals. In the Arizona playoff loss he couldn’t run any 2 point plays because, big surprise, every 2 point conversion play relied on Randall Cobb. Sort of like the 2010 offense revolving around Finley, huh? Now in his attempt to prove he isn’t a conservative coach, rather than live for another set of downs, let’s get cute and go for the home run on 3rd and 2. Is McCarthy not aware the passing game sucks ass and has for some time? Missed, now 4th and 2. WHY is Ripkowski on the team? When was the last time they even used a lead blocker? Remember not so long ago when Rodgers would hit 9, 10, 11 different receivers in a game? Seems like a entire other era now. This has nothing to do with being only the 2nd game of the season.

    Zero intensity yet again for the offense. At least Cook was kind of involved. Callahan was more entertaining to watch than this offense to this point. And that idiot stands up there, even after the half, and talks about their 3rd down opportunities. How about calling some plays that don’t constantly lead to having to convert on 3rd down, let alone long 3rd downs? Like maybe using more than 3 of the 7 wide receivers you kept. Adams did what Adams does.

  9. Mark Sweeney

    Put in the other receivers, Adams is a fifth at best
    We need more speed. With that said I expect the offense
    to be clicking after our week off that comes early
    this year, May be a blessing

  10. MMTTDCSUCK

    As I have been saying for a few years now, McGlurpy is an embarrassment. The MOST OVERATED coach in the NFL bar none . . . All the teams know what he is going to do. Run left, run left. Pass. Aaron Rodgers is playing scared or he has been concussed so badly in the past that his wits are not what they used to be. Again, something that I was saying 6 to 7 motherfucking years ago . . . shitty fucking O line and shitty O line coach. Shitty fucking play caller and a stupid fucking coach. A DC that has his “great DB’s” constantly playing 5-7 yards off of the other teams WR’s. This fucking coaching staff is just like watching “Groundhogs Day”. And fuck all the homers that are in denial! because if you assholes would have had the balls to speak out instead of being followers to this fucked staff, these fucks would have been gone 3 to 4 years ago.Thanks assholes! When a QB (Sam Bradford) can come in and play like that with his NEW FUCKING RECEIVERS, and those same receivers can catch the football from their NEW FUCKING QB1; Green Bay and it’s homer fans need to wake the fuck up and start pointing fingers at that fucktard Buffoon and TT and DC. Why can other teams transition this quickly? This should not even be an issue anymore . . . but it is, and it is NOT GOING AWAY anytime soon. And as EMPACADOR stated earlier; “Remember not so long ago when Rodgers would hit 9, 10, 11 different receivers in a game?” How true! WTF has happened? Get rid of these over rated fucks now . . . And find out what happened to Rodgers and his ability to throw to anyone without a problem, as well as his ability to NOT overthrow and NOT bail early. Something is up with him. It is not good.

  11. Danforth Cuntingdon-Smythe

    Don Capers has made both Colin Kaepernick and Sam Bradford look like top-tier quarterbacks.

  12. Lynn Fuckin' Dickey

    Cant blame Capers for once on this one. D front 7 played insane and if Shields is healhy that is a dominating performance all around.

    No, this one is on McCarthy. He is lost, the league has figured him out. He is so incredibly stubborn with his shitty little inside pitch plays which almost never work. Going for it on 4th down, by giving the ball to James Starks up the gut, I might add, is one of the dumbest calls I have seen in some time. Absolute Buffoonery. Total Retard.

    Also, as Homer said in the post game show, when DeVante Adams is on the field, you lose. He may be a grea athlete, he may get so many targets because he is getting open. Those things dont matter when he cant catch the ball or runs the wrong route. This guy is a bum, bench his ass and see what Abby or the rookie has got.

    This Vikes team is good, and like Seattle they are built to remain relevant for a while even with mediocre QB play. I dont find them as hatable as past Vikings teams, I think Zimmer is a solid guy and there are no real objectionable scum bags on the team anymore. Strap in, boys, because the next decade belongs to Minnesota and their sheep-fucking fans.

  13. Deepsky

    We Packer fans have to wake up and smell the coffee.

    Rodgers isn’t the same guy. He’s done. He’s no longer even an average quarterback. His once uncanny accuracy and confidence are gone.

    The last 10 games in 2015 he had a pathetic 81 QB rating, which would have ranked him in the bottom quarter of all NFL QBs. I called this out many times and was railed at by a lot of fans. What’s his QB rating this season? It’s 82. His line is healthy, he has Jordy Nelson on the field and a decent pass catching tight end. He has the weapons and the time.

    He’s done. McCarthy’s offense worked because Rodgers had the confidence and accuracy to put the ball in tight windows overcoming pedestrian play calling and receivers. Rodgers can’t do that anymore. He was just vastly outplayed by Sam Bradford.

    It’s time to start thinking about the next Packer starting QB.

    • MMTTDCSUCK

      Unfortunately maybe this ^^^^ Rodgers may have had his bell rung one too many times . . . He is NOT the same at all.

  14. ARS85

    I’ll start with the D. They played about as well as you could have asked them to. Randall aside, as he obviously had his worst game as a pro and that’s going to happen to a young corner. Unfortunately all we have is young corners because we rebuild our defense every three years with draft picks. I’ll take 17 points against every week. Get some sacks and hopefully a turnover or two and it gives your team a chance to always win, or at the very least be in the game.

    As for the offense. I said I wouldn’t panic after week one and wouldn’t begin to until after i saw a few weeks of it in action, but unfortunately I think it’s time to panick. I don’t even know where to being so I will just list my issues…

    1. Mike McCarthy…. His play calling is disgraceful. These play action passes to open up a wideout at the line of scrimmage are laughable. His idea of offense is having a guy break 7 tackles to get a first down. Two deep safeties was how teams figured out this offense years ago, how do you counter that? By using the middle of the field and forcing the safeties to collapse, eventually opening up the deep shots. God forbid we throw over the middle more than 4 times a game.

    2. Personnel…. Why do we have 7 wide receivers on the roster if we are only going to parade the same three out there play after play and never spread anyone out? This is beyond me and I have no explanation for it. Is it some love affair with not releasing draft picks as Monty usually suggests? It very well could be, because I have no other explanation for having all these guys on the roster, only to have them ride pine and play special teams. Speaking of terrible personnel decisions, what is the deal with this running back platoon. Lacy is the back. He should be in 75-80% of the game. Starks is your change of pace. McCarthy was rolling with a 33% split the first two and a half quarters and the last 33% was going to fucking Randall Cobb. Get this guy out of the backfield. This gimmick shit doesn’t work, this isn’t college football. You are playing world class defenders who study game film and know that you only run the same three plays for Cobb out of the backfield. It doesn’t work.

    3. Aaron Rodgers….. He looks like a shell of the qb he once was. He has zero confidence to make throws. Back shoulders fades to nobody, sideline routes where he just sails the ball into the bench. Where is the aggressiveness? Where is the guy who could fit a football through the tightest of windows? What happened to that player? Do I blame some of it on the receivers? Sure. Jordy has zero burst right now and devante can make great first moves, only to then get zero separation and even if he gets some it’s still 50/50 he’s making the catch. That being said Rodgers still made some terribly inaccurate throws. I’m convinced he hates McCarthy, there’s something going on. Every play we are winding it down to 0 while he audibles. How is that possible?

    All that being said I would expect this type of performance from this team week after week unless something drastic changes. It was painful to watch last year and could be shaping up that way again. The worst part about it all in my opinion, is the days leading up to the game, where I have that hope that this will be the week the offense gets its mojo back because we have Aaron Rodgers…. And I know almost all of you get that same feeling. That’s what makes it so disappointing. At least fans of teams who are bad know they are gonna be bad. The packers aren’t bad…. But are they good? Championship calibre good? At this point I would say not even close.

  15. rebelgb

    The ship has sailed on this team. I dont want to yell “fire” 2 weeks into the season but lets drop the green and gold colored glasses and be real ok? This isnt 2 games. This is a year and 2 games, really more when you consider the playoff loss to Seattle. Before that im even willing to say that a once dominant QB named Aaron Rodgers hid a truth about a very poor head coach. Now the Packers have a QB named Error’nd Rodgers who bears little resemblance to the 2013 QB of a different first name. This Rodgers cannot hide the futility that is the Green Bay Packers head coach, and likely the ineptness of its GM Ted Thompson.

    Error’nd Rodgers poor play cannot cover up the coaching of a man who puts his #2 Reciever in the backfield when he has a pro bowl RB who is healthy. A coach who makes a pro bowl caliber RB sit on the bench for almost the entire 3rd quarter while the second stringer gets the snaps. A coach who runs a corner route 8 yards deep in the end zone on 3rd and 1 in the opponents red zone then when that play predictably fails (hasnt worked in 2 years) he runs his second string RB to predictable doom. Is anyone suprised that this same coach said “we had a good play called” to the press when asked about that call? Is anyone suprised that same coach said this loss was just “tough sleddin”. This guys ego has been so far removed from reality for so long there is zero accounting for it.

    A potential HoF QB allowed a amateur ego maniac pretending to be a coach be pretty damn good for a lot of years; but really other than one magical season, never really good enough. But now that the HoF er is gone and his very average twin is playing QB for the Green Bay Packers, the twinkling cloud is gone and the ugly ghoul that is Mike Mccarthy is apparent for all to see.

    As the mystique and shiny ness fades away I wonder how long before the rest of the country sees this current Packer regime for the joke it is. I wonder if in the future the truth will be told about how bad this coach really is and how a once potential HoF QB was the only shimmer of light in an otherwise dull grey period; or if the lie of how “great” a play caller and game coach MM will still be remembered.

  16. rebelgb

    Too add to my criticism of MM and his total ineptness as a coach, what team with a good QB (thats all i can call him right now) and a full quiver of supposedly talented receivers, runs a roll out that isolates one receiver to a small window of grass on an otherwise large playing field? Im talking about the 4th quarter Rodgers roll right to an isolated Jordy. A play that failed miserably. Think about this. Thats the type of play you design for a 2nd string QB who has to come in and take over for an injured starter during a game. Thats a play you design for a rookie QB making his first start. A play designed to eliminate the need for reading defenses or scanning the field. With Jared Cook, Jordy Nelson, Montgomery, Cobb, Abaderis, and Error’nd Rodgers why are you not spreading the field and dropping Rodgers back to find an open man? The play calling of this joke of a head coach is unequaled in stupidity.

  17. PF4L

    When you hold a team to 30 yards rushing, and that team commits 13 penalty’s for 137 yards, you have to play extra bad to lose. Mission accomplished.

    I’ll repeat myself weekly if need be. The Packers need an infusion of new blood concerning the GM and coaching positions. This team needs a fresh new energy. At the very least, bring in a off. coordinator with a strong mind with new idea’s who can call plays and won’t be a yes man to McCarthy.

    What i’m trying to say is, you have McCarthy calling plays, you have Edger Bennett as offensive coordinator, and you have Tom Clements as Asst. head coach of the offensive. So you have a total of 3 people, and they still can’t figure it out.

    NEW BLOOD.

  18. PF4L

    Unfortunately, they only way changes are made, is if the team suffers, which is what they are doing now. More unfortunately, is the fact that the Packers could go 1-15, and Mark Murphy wouldn’t do a fucking thing. Other than to say he doesn’t question the GM or coach.

    So the only way we see changes, is if TT and MM resign, For Ted to resign, someone would need to walk in his office to wake him up. We (the reporters) could ask TT about the team, but that would entail TT standing in front of a microphone, and that isn’t gonna happen. McCarthy wouldn’t resign, so the only way he leaves is if TT or Murphy fire him. We have a better chance of winning the lottery because that would entail showing leadership.

    Good thing McCarthy took play calling duties back, it’s so much better now.

    • Empacador

      You know, it is quite possible McCarthy lost the team after that loss to the Seahawks in the NFC championship. Everything since that melt down has been shit.

  19. JD

    Amazing how Bradford with little more than a week preparation with a new team outplayed Rodgers. He made some great plays. I really can’t fault our defense, they played well enough to give us a win. Guess we’ll see how MM and Rodgers with their suck-O offense deal with this weeks well deserved harsh criticism.

    • Deepsky

      LIke I posted last week, Bradford is better than Bridgewater who can’t hit a pass longer than 20 yards. This is Bradford’s strength.

      His weakness is that he is a statue and won’t last more than 3 games.

  20. Mike

    I don’t even know where to start. Fortunately, everyone here has already touched on all the same issues I saw. We know nothing will change anytime soon but change is needed. The same players, coaches and plays are gonna produce the same old shit week after week, year after year. We can’t beat a Minnesota team with no rushing game and a new qb with only a couple weeks to work with his offense? How do they expect to beat an Arizona or Carolina?

    The play calling is atrocious and too predictable. Seems like Rodgers knows all they can do is try for free plays and hope to get free yards off PI calls. I’m all for being aggressive but the way the game was going last night, even I said take the 3. The whole sequence was horrible. On 3rd down was a pass to Nelson that had no chance. Then on 4th they give it to Starks. I looked at the personnel and knew before they snapped it they we’re screwed. Where’s lacy? If you know your going for it, why not give him 2 chances to get it. Seems like once again they never really gave him a chance to get going. If he don’t get 10 yards a carry they give up on him. Where’s Kuhn to get those? What’s the point of having ripkowski on the roster? Same goes for Montgomery and Abby and Janis when he’s 100% healthy. All we see is Nelson Cobb Adams and once in a while cook. I’m sure the other wrs can’t possibly be worse than Adams yet they continue to make it a point to throw to Adams. I have a friend that knows nothing about gb, he’s a sf fan and we saw the game together last night and he said something that made me lol because it’s something we all know and now here’s someone saying the same thing after watching one game. He said “I cringe every time they throw to Adams, something just always seems off”.

    Rodgers gets just as much blame here. He had how many bad passes once again? A couple I can think of are the one to cook where he might have had a big gain. Was just a simple pass to the flat and it was horrible. Jordy across the middle is another one. Hell hes lucky Newman didn’t pick one off early in the game. Was right at him. In addition to the passes he’s leaving the pocket way too soon, just looks discombobulated. Maybe he shoulda played more preseason and not worried so much about getting injured.

    The d played well. Holding Minnesota to 17 should get the W. Still not a fan of Burnett and Randall did get worked by that piece of shit diggs which concerns me even more of shields is done and when we face teams with pro bowl caliber wrs. Hope the guion injury isn’t serious. Already thin there.

    They get to play at home vs the lions before the bye and looking at Detroit yesterday, the pack should have no problem. Should is the key word. If they win an ugly one or somehow lose at home to a divisional opponent again, something has to give over the bye. Even an easy win, I think somethings gotta give. I’m sure if they blow Detroit out Rodgers and company will say everything’s fine and everything will be status quo. As someone mentioned earlier, nothing will change unless the team really suffers. I can’t stomach losing at home to Detroit and falling to 1-2 and then having to sit on that for a bye. However part of me says maybe it’s the best if it results in some type of coaching shake up, but let’s be real, the pack could lose 27-10 this week and Murphy and Thompson wouldnt change a thing. I hope these guys can get their shit together and not have another wasted season where we do just enough to get in and end up being sent home by the nfc west.

  21. Nic

    I hare to sound like a broken record but I have been saying for years now that the teams success has been in spite of MM coaching.I am not happy losing but I’m glad to see so many people starting to realize it.Now if we could get the ears of the people in power to elicit change we could still salvage another year of wasting the talent on this team.

  22. Xlvordie

    Correct me if I’m wrong but thompson is likely here through 2017 due to his contract before in all likelihood Elliott Wolfe takes over?

    Seems very unlikely Thompson would be removed from his position before then and probably just as unlikely that Thompson gives mccarthy the boot.

    Leading me to believe that we have 2 more years of this shit before wolfe takes over and “rebuild” begins which will just lead a few more years of disappointment and a feeling that most packer fans under 30 have never even experienced.

  23. Xlvordie

    And maybe more than just a few years.. whi knows how fast wolfe gets rid of mccarthy or maybe he brings in a mother clown of a head coach.
    Maybe wolfe can’t draft or put a team together for shit. Would he be employed by any nfl team if not for his namesake? Hopefully he inherited his fathere talent and not just his name.

    • MMTTDCSUCK

      Exactly. What I would love to see is some empirical data that represents E. Wolf’s current accomplishments . . . If in fact there are any . . .

      • Big B

        Director of Pro Personnel for the Packers is like being the Maytag repairman- there’s nothing to do. In GB that is barely a part time position, maybe don’t even qualify for benefits. That job entails knowing about players from other teams that might become available in free agency, which makes it a moot point.

  24. Kato

    Still not pushing the panic button yet, this was arguably one of the top 2 or 3 hardest games of the season. However, I would be lying if I said my finger wasn’t hovering over the top of it. I am completely mystified by Aaron Rodgers play. As someone eluded to earlier, why are the packers carrying 7 WRs yet only utilizing three of them? I wish they would go back to using multiple formations and different personnel.

  25. Xlvordie

    Sorry for all the type errors it’s hard to comment via phone with pop ups every 10 seconds

  26. Mike

    The Packer Organization is always 5-10 years behind the times. The Cadaver Thompson & Peanut M&M McCarthy needed to go the year they refused to part with 3rd round draft choice for Marshawn Lynch. Murphy has no NADS to do anything and is more concerned about attending pep rallies. You just want to pull your hair outta your skull riding out this POS mess. Lets never try and win 2-3 Super Bowls??? NOOOOO Titletown means hopefully win 1 every 30 years. 2 HOF QBs for 30 years will net us 2 SBs, while FILTHY UNWASHED Steelers win another 3-4. Packers need to try and hire Jon Gruden, perfect fit, but that “My Little Pony” Board of Walking Dead Directors or Murphy will never do it.

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