Packers vs. Browns: Who We’ll Be Watching

Barring any last-minute paint-related catastrophes, the Green Bay Packers will open their preseason slate against the Cleveland Browns at Lambeau Field, Friday evening. While that alone isn’t terribly exciting, it is football and it is some semblance of Green Bay Packers football.

More importantly, it’s an audition for a lot of guys. This is when roster spots get secured and when jobs are won and lost. As such, we’re interested in seeing how a number of players perform under the lights, when the hitting is real.

Here’s who will have our attention tonight and why.

1. Blake Martinez — We hear the rookie inside linebacker can cover. He’s supposedly a great communicator. What we want to know is if he can tackle. Martinez does wear No. 50, after all. The guy who used to wear that number was famous for getting pushed around and diving on piles after the fact.
2. Kenny Clark — He’s the other rookie we’ve been waiting to see in actual game action. The Packers’ first-round pick is supposedly the real deal. Well, we’re about to see if that’s the case, aren’t we?
3. Jeff Janis — He’s been a veritable non-factor in camp, but that’s nothing new. Where Janis has always shown (when he actually gets the opportunity), has been in the games. If he comes to play when it counts, then he can get himself back in the No. 3 receiver conversation.
4. Davante Adams — Is this suckwad going to continue his suckwad play from 2015 as we fully expect? Or is he going to turn it around? Frankly, we expect the Packers to leave Adams in the game long enough to get action against second and third-team defenders so he looks great. Then they can pretend that Davante Adams is the answer for a little bit longer.
5. Joe Callahan — The undrafted third-string QB is expected to get the start again this week. That could be a disaster. It could also be a lot of fun. This kid set all kinds of records at the Division III collegiate level. We should find out pretty quickly how he stacks up at the NFL level.
6. Geronimo Allison — Here’s the undrafted rookie free agent who’s been turning heads in camp. Unfortunately for him, he plays receiver. He’ll have to overcome some great odds to make the team. Playing as well in the games as he has in practice is the way to make that happen.
7. Jared Cook — The big tight end has looked like the real deal in limited action. If he’s active tonight, we’ll be interested to see what he does in game action.
8. Jake Ryan — We’re not sure who’s going to end up starting at inside linebacker. What we do know is we’ve heard nothing about Ryan since camp started. That would suggest he hasn’t been terribly impressive. So what do you say, Jake Ryan? Gonna do something other than stand next to your Porsche across from the church waiting for Sam?
9. Jared Abbrederis — Just because it’s always great to see Badger great Jerry Abberderry.
10. RGIII — Yeah, I know. Fuck the Cleveland Browns. They’re a JV franchise. But we are curious to see if this clown can still play quarterback at all. It wasn’t that long ago he looked like a franchise QB in the making. Then Washington totally ruined him. Nobody other than the Browns wanted to give him a chance, but you have to think there’s still some talent in there somewhere.