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USA Today tried to pull off a post about the worst possible jersey a fan could own for every NFL team. Some of them were no-brainers, like the Ryan Leaf San Diego Chargers jersey. Others were just dumb or complete failures, such as their choice for the Green Bay Packers jersey.

That guy above was their answer.

Brandon Bostick.

And yes, while Brandon Bostick was a goat in that NFC Championship game, so were a lot of other guys. Ha Ha Clinton-Dix, Aaron Rodgers and Morgan Burnett to name a few.

Besides that, no one has ever been seen walking around in a Brandon Bostick jersey.

You don’t buy the jersey of the third-string tight end. In fact, that’s something that you’d have to fork over $120 for to have custom-made. You don’t just pick up the third-string tight end jersey off the rack. It isn’t on the rack.

Oh, so we must have a better worst jersey then?

You’re damn right.

This piece of shit right here.

Darren Sharper

Yes, serial rapist Darren Sharper.

Although he started his career with the Green Bay Packers, we will always remember him as a Minnesota Viking. Because Vikings are rapists.

He must have picked that up there.

Who could possibly have one of these, you say?

Well, this guy right here.

Packers jersey collection

For those of you who don’t remember, Sharper played eight seasons with the Packers. He made two Pro Bowls and was a first-team All Pro in 2000, when he led the league with nine interceptions. Back then, it was perfectly reasonable to own a Darren Sharper jersey.

Not so much anymore.

But let’s confine this to the football realm, since no one is a more disgusting human being than Sharper.

Here are our top five worst Green Bay Packers jerseys that people actually owned (no third-string tight ends).

Randy Wright

5. Randy Wright

Good old Randy Wright. Badger great, Packer not-so-great. Wright quarterbacked the team (badly) during the most hideous time period of Packers football in my lifetime.

Brent Fullwood

Darrell Thompson

4. Brent Fullwood and Darrell Thompson

This one is a tie between two of the worst running backs to ever carry a football for Packers, Brent Fullwood and Darrell Thompson. Both were high first-round picks. Both were garbage in the NFL. What’s Fullwood doing there? Fumbling? Probably.

Joe Johnson

3. Joe Johnson

Was there a worse free agent signing in Packers history than Joe Johnson? No. No there was not.

Terrell Buckley

2. Terrell Buckley

TBuck! Terrell Buckley. This bag of dicks never wanted to play for the Packers. We drafted him anyway and then he sucked. You can go straight to hell TBuck!

Javon Walker

Mike McKenzie

1. Javon Walker and Mike McKenzie

Here’s another tie. Javon Walker and Mike McKenzie. I’ll tell you this. If you turn out to be the type of shitwad who doesn’t want to play for the greatest franchise in all of sports and then try to hold that franchise hostage with your shitty demands, you are only about a millimeter below Darren Sharper in my book. If either of these guys were on fire, I wouldn’t even piss on them to put it out.

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Mordecai Jones

Mordecai is a writer living in Los Angeles. He primarily writes screenplays, but also does crap like this because GREEN BAY PACKERS, baby!

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12 Comments

  1. Gary Stevenson May 18, 2016

    This is the greatest article I believe I’ve ever read!! “Bag of dicks!” Love it. Classic.

    1. Anti-McCarthy fan June 3, 2016

      SHUT UP FOOL YOUR JUST AS DUMB AS MIKE MCHIPPO.

  2. Empacador May 19, 2016

    Wright came from the Forrest Gregg era if I’m not mistaken. Gregg, along with Tom Braatz and Lindy Infante were mostly responsible for that mid to late 80s/early 90s suckfest including gifting the Packers with Fullwood and Thompson. They wasted their top picks in ’86, ’87 and ’90 on running backs. They could have had Barry Sanders but that year they draft the only guy in the top 5 of the ’89 draft who didn’t make the NFL Hall of Fame. It was tough being a Packer fan during those lean years, they couldn’t do anything right.

    I know everybody rags on Ted Thompson, but Ron Wolf laid some turds as well. To think the Packers could have had Troy Vincent instead of Buckley. McKenzie was decent as I recall, beating out Antuan Edwards and Fred Vinson to become a starter. I think his issue was he didn’t like Ron’s hand pick successor to Ron in Mike Sherman and forced his way out of Green Bay. For which Sherman gave us Javon Walker and Joe Johnson. Maybe McKenzie was on to something.

  3. Phillthy May 19, 2016

    lol I agree mostly with the list, with the exception of a couple guys before my time. I started really collecting jerseys and Sharper, Chmura, Walker and Mckenzie are ones I will not touch.

  4. Killer May 19, 2016

    I agree that it needs to be a jersey people might actually own realistically. In addition, Bostick had one bad play that he was scapegoated for the entire loss for by the cowardly duo of McCarthy and Thompson. Those cowards scapegoated him and were not even man enough to personally meet with him or call him. A total sacrifice placed ceremonially on the giant grill normally used to roast bratwurst.

    Other than that one play — where Bostick was trying to help and trying to make a play for God’s Sake — Bostick was 4th on special teams tackles, a truly rare feat for a TE on any team.

    So, what jersey?

    It should be someone who played well or great but whose on field accomplishments are so dwarfed by off the filed behavior that a person should be totally too shamed to wear it. Letroy Guion or Andrew Quarless would qualify with shameful off field behavior but their play on the filed has been poor at best so they are disqualified.

    Darren Sharper is an excellent choice expect for one thing. He really does take the cake as a serial rapist and anyone would be ashamed to wear his jersey. But, there are two problems. His best play and most recent superior play was as a Viking so some could confuse him as a Vikings player primarily despite the predominance of time in Green Bay. Secondly, some — like this writer — could confuse or claim that his rapes began after he left Green Bay. We know this is not true from the years his victims were raped. We know it began as a Green Bay Packer and actually reduced in frequency dramatically during his time in Minnesota before increasing again once he left Minnesota. But few fans (and this writer) take the time to research this. They even ignore Sharper’s own quote that “I fell in with a bad group of teammates in Green Bay. It was considered standard practice there. They get a pass from the law in and around Wisconsin. That’s why they don’t leave Green Bay. Free drugged sex without accountability or fear of being caught. It’s been a tradition on that team and still is from what I hear. Man, I never should have left Green Bay.”

    So, all in all, I think Mark Chmura is the best choice.

    1. Phatgzus May 19, 2016

      10 Bostick was Nnot scapegoated by anyone in the organization, you incredible dumbass, he didn’t do his job and it cost the team a Super Bowl performance, he also had issues not doing his job/listening to the coaches long before that play, and that’s why he never saw the field. I don’t know how the rules work in whatever fucking gumdrop palace-laiden candyassland you live in, but here in the the real world if you keep ignoring your boss, doing whatever the fuck you like, and fucking the operation up, you get canned-pretty fucking simple.

      2) Darren Sharper’s best years were in Green Bay; and are you seriously going to take the word of someone who’s moral label is serial rapist? LMFAO, because he wouldn’t say ANYTHING to make himself look like less of a blight on humanity.

      3) As a Queens fan are you sure you really want to be talking shit about off-field behavior? That’s precious.

      1. Killer May 19, 2016

        Fatguts, you are cutting down on your profanity! At 25 cents per profanity you only earned $1.75 with your post. You left a lot of money on the table there.

        As per Bostick he was even told when they had an underling call him with the news of his release (whose timing already showcased that scapegoating was the reason) that the fumble on the onside kick recovery attempt was the reason for his release. Keep in mind, when you talk about him not following directions, the special teams coach was one of the worst that year and was also let go eventually. In the parlance of potty-mouth Fatguts that means, “How dare that dumbass not listen to his dumbass coach give him dumbass direction and not take the dumbass words into his dumbass heart.” Poor Bostick. Damned no matter what happened.

        Packer fans and McCarthy and TT love to pretend that the Greatest Choke on Earth was a game stolen from them by one play by one player and it is just clearly not true. The better team won. Numerous players on the lesser team failed to make plays and/or made critical errors. The Greatest Choke was a team effort.

        Even if you fail to see logic as is and still want to attribute it all to Bostick, in effect becoming a scapegoater yourself (I know, you usually do other much more intimate things with goats than “scaping” them…) then you should perhaps chew on this logic: Why was Bostick on the team? Who brought him to Green Bay, who kept him on the roster, who coached him, who activated him for the game? None other than… (dramatic pause)… TT and Mike McCarthy!

        1. Packers fan June 3, 2016

          I do agree with some stuff you mentioned about MM. That game is the ONLY TIME I will blame MM for NOT reaching the Super Bowl. In my opinion, I felt he played not to lose I don’t know why and he went very conservative. That’s the only game I know MM went ultra conservative. Don’t get me wrong I like MM and he is a good coach but however he is not a great coach. Examples of great coaches are Belichick and Arians. Examples of good coaches are Andy Reid and Mike McCarthy. Both AR and MM did good things but they also did bad things with their teams. MM should not be fired and I would rather win another Super Bowl with MM. I don’t know who should even replace him! Gruden and Cowher retired and are on TV. It was that overrated TT who I believe that signed and kept him, not MM in my opinion.

          The Packers choke collapse is just like this years OKC Thunder collapse against the Overrated Golden State Warriors when they lead 3-1 and let them comeback to win the series 4-3. Last year (2014-2015) the Clippers completed a similar collapse to the Packers and it was both in the same year. The LA Clippers led 3-1 but choked to let Houston win the series. I do not think the Packers collapse was the Greatest Choke on Earth but considered one of the top 10 collapses in the NFL. I think last year’s Clippers was a worst collapse than the Packers collapse in Seattle.

          1. Packers fan June 3, 2016

            That game I am referring to is the Seahawks NFC Championship.

  5. Durr Hurrr May 19, 2016

    John Hadl, Asbestos Hood, Tony Mandarich, David Whitehurst, and Ahmad Carroll would like a word with you out back after they’re done sticking a fire hose up Rich Campbell’s anus.

  6. David May 25, 2016

    Tony Mandarich he was dog shit and we picked him.

  7. Anti-McCarthy fan June 3, 2016

    I CAN TELL YOU IDIOTS WHO IS THE WORST EVER PACKER TO WEAR A JERSEY. MD JENNINGS. MD JENNINGS SUCKS ASS AND WHEN HE LEFT HE SHOULD HAVE TOOK MIKE MCHIPPO WITH HIIM BECAUSE THOSE 2 WOULD BE GOOD ASS FRIENDS. FUCK MD JENNINGS FUCK MIKE MCHIPPO AND FUCK TOM BUM ASS CLEMENTS BECAUSE THESE 3 PEOPLE SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK. THEY FREAKING SUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK ARE YOU STUPID MOUTHS BLIND!