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The Minnesota Vikings Are Winners Now!

Mike Zimmer

When you’re a perennial loser and part of an all-time shit stain of an organization, sometimes you need a little confidence boost. A little pep talk. And that’s what the Minnesota Vikings got from head coach and master motivator Mike Zimmer after Sunday’s win.

Here’s Zimmer speaking to the boys.

Oh, wait…

That’s not what he said!

Here’s what he said.

“We’re not done yet, we’ve still got a long way to go,” Zimmer said. “If we play like we did today and last Thursday, if we play that way, with that focus, that intensity, preparation, toughness, we’re going to do a lot of damage. We get in this thing, there’s going to be a lot. Let’s go win this division. Everybody gets a game ball because they can’t ever call you a loser again. They can never call you that. Because we’re winners from now on.”

Yeah, guys! We’re winners from now on!

By golly!

I actually have no words. You go ahead and run with that…

Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.



  1. David December 22, 2015

    Serindipity on that particular comedy skit… considering that Al Franken is Minnesota’s junior senator.

  2. Steve Jobs December 22, 2015

    Is it me or does Zimmer look a little like the Travelocity Gnome?

  3. Steve Jobs December 22, 2015

    Maybe it’s more of a leprechaun appearance.

  4. Beck December 22, 2015

    Things are gonna change, I can feel it.

  5. MMTTDCSUCK December 22, 2015

    Yep! they all get “Participation Trophies” . . .

  6. Skinny December 22, 2015

    My god, its Jerry Mathers from Leave it to Beaver.

  7. Osseo, WI December 22, 2015

    Ever notice that those little participation ribbons are always purple?

  8. SIM December 22, 2015

    No one can call you a looser after winning one division? Way to set the bar high for your players!

  9. SIM December 22, 2015


  10. Phatgzus December 22, 2015

    Looks like Chuck E Cheese to me.

    That’s great, Minni, now go out and lose your next 3 games, you’ll still be winners in my book.

  11. Northwoods December 23, 2015

    Bridgewater had more TDs than incompletions Sunday.

    Has Shaaron ever done that?

  12. Phatgzus December 23, 2015


    No, but he’s been damn close.

    He has, however, won two league MVPs, as well as one in the Super Bowl, a game which he won, btw. He’s also thrown SIX TDs in a game, scratch that, one HALF of a game.
    Has Turdy ever done that? No, you say? But he has thrown for six TDs in a span of EIGHT games you say? Through his first seasons years he’s on pace to have fewer total TD passes than Aaron Rodgers has had in ONE, you say? While at the same time having thrown as many INTs per seasons as Rodgers has in two, you say?

    Silly, Vikings troll, er fan (sorry, that’s redundant), know your franchise’s hilarious futility before you decide to attack THE most successful one in the sport’s history. That’s about as fruitful as a British army of 5 riding up to the battlemented walls of a French castle, riding
    imaginary horse and banging coconuts together, then assaulting said castle by lobbing said coconuts at said wall in a manner similar to said all time Viking great QB, Theodore Bridgewater.

  13. Northwoods December 24, 2015

    Hmmmm….Rodgers had 1 TD through his first 3 seasons. Bridgewater had 14 his first season.

    You want to keep cherry-picking stats?

    1. Phatgzus December 24, 2015

      LMFAO “cherry-picking”. Rodgers sat his first three years, he still would’ve put up better stats in one year than teddy has in 2. Keep comparing Teddy Bridgewater to Aaron Rodgers. Sweet, your shot QB three more than 2 TDs in a game for the first time is career, big fucking whoop. Just wait ‘ til AP is gone and Teddy has to carry the O, that’ll be fuckin hilarious.

      1. northwoodsv2 December 27, 2015

        If you put the bratwurst down you might be able to spell a word or two.

        So, what you’re saying is Rodgers wasn’t good enough to play his first 3 years. I get it.

      2. Northwoods December 28, 2015

        Heh heh heh….would have? That’s all you got? WOULD HAVE? I’ll play – bet he ‘would have’ put up better stats than he did against AZ yesterday. I bet he ‘would have’ put up better stats than he did against Chicago……both times added together.

        Face it – Rodgers is effecting his typical end-of-season disappearing act yet again. One and Done.

  14. Taken Cherry December 26, 2015

    Vikings may be good enough to win, but according to Jennifer Matthews, her little brother doesn’t even exist in her tweets. Just Clay.