Type to search

You Are Not the Best Fans in the NFL*

Dallas Cowboys fans

Every team has the best fans in the world. Know what I mean?

That’s a load of crap, of course. I mean, Minnesota Vikings fans. They’re literally the worst in every possible way, so it’s physically impossible for them to be the best.

But once in a while, we get rankings. Let’s rank every team’s fan base using some secret formula!

We got one of those this week from Emory University. Yeah, that’s right. It’s a scientific ranking.

Because science, motherfucker!

And guess what.

You ain’t No. 1.

And by you, I mean Green Bay Packers fans.


The shitbags who like the Dallas Cowboys are No. 1.

Surely, you’re No. 2, though?

Fuck no!

No. 7.


Feeling slighted? Yeah, you probably should be.

So how did these mongoloids arrive at such a conclusion?

Here’s some explanation.

In particular, we are focused on market outcomes like attendance, prices or revenues. A lot of marketing research focused on branding issues relies on things like consumer surveys. This is fine in some ways, but opinion surveys are also problematic. It’s one thing to just say you are a fan of a local team, and quite another to be willing to pay several thousand dollars to purchase a season ticket.

Well, shit. The Green Bay Packers have the longest season ticket waiting list in the history of history!

Not good enough.

These particular rankings are based heavily on revenue. Like are fans willing to pay a lot of money to support this team? Or, do fans shell out dough to support this team even when they’re crappy?

Well, the answer for the Packers is yes and yes, but the problem is, the Packers’ ticket prices are lower than a lot of NFL teams. So when you do a study that puts a premium on revenue, especially ticket revenue, the Packers won’t fare well.

Essentially, the rankings then aren’t “best fan base,” they’re “fan base most willing spend money on team.”

And that’s probably not even accurate. Packers fans will literally buy anything Packers-related.

Family Night and Brett Favre’s Packers Hall of Fame induction ceremony (where people actually bought tickets to watch something on TV that’s happening in the next room) are two prime examples.

Would the fucking Cowboys sell out crap like that?

Highly doubt it.

But stuff like that doesn’t matter when your data is based on pricing.

So if the Packers priced higher, then you’d be No. 1, according to these people.


Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.



  1. E. Wolf July 9, 2015

    As if I did not have enough with the Brett Favre propaganda and JJ Watt beating out Rodgers, more horseshit is thrown our way. Idiotic to equate pricing with fan devotion.

  2. Abe Frohman July 9, 2015

    * Jerry Jones subsidized that study.

  3. 1265Lombardiave July 9, 2015

    Did those ass-monkeys take this into for the Pack?

    2011 Stock Sale; More than 268,000 shares were sold at $250 apiece during the 12-week sale, generating roughly $67 million in revenue.

    1997 Stock Sale; About 120,000 were sold at $200 apiece, raising $24 million in revenue.

    1. Adam July 9, 2015

      Pretty sure the answer is no because, bare with me now… if my math is correct, 1998 and 2011 are not 2015.

      1. 1265Lombardiave July 9, 2015

        The article did state that they “did use multiple years of data for each team in a given league.” And 2015 does not equal multiple years.

        Regardless, it’s bullshit filler until we get to training camp.

  4. BZ in BA July 9, 2015

    “in the history of history!”
    This is now becoming part of my daily lexicon. THIS IS GREAT JOURNALISTIC WRITING! Thanks!

  5. Howard July 9, 2015

    I have conducted my own survey over the years and I call Oh Bull Shit to this survey. First true fans support their team through good and bad. Second I have gone to many different sports bars on game day, in different cities, and States all outside of Wisconsin.

    The first thing you notice is all the different fans that show up when their team has no losses. As the season goes on and their teams start losing those fans disappear even though their team still may have a fighting chance to make the playoffs or win a game. Two of the most obnoxious fan bases that disappear as their team does in the season or during a game are the cowboys and Vikings. Things go bad and poof they disappear.

    There are three teams that the fan base shows up in force throughout the season if their team is in the hunt or not. That includes staying to the bitter end of a losing game. Those teams fans are the Packers, Raiders and Steelers in that order. Packers fans are by far the best, with large groups and they show up for a full game and season win or lose. Raiders fan base should be a lot higher as should the Steelers.

  6. CO Bob July 9, 2015

    Come on Total Packers…
    This one did NOTHING to rev me up.
    More Brett Favre stuff, please…pretty please?

    1. icebowl July 10, 2015

      Ditto on that CO….
      I got the fever, and the only cure us more Olivia….

  7. shawn July 9, 2015

    The Dallas Cowboys would have no shot in hell in selling out a practice.

    Actually, no other team would, though I would give the Steelers the best shot at it.

    1. Deepsky July 10, 2015

      When the Packers moved the practice field farther east, the added a nice area with a lot of bleacher seats to watch them practice for free. Many times this area is full and you have to wait before they let you watch the practice.

      1. shawn July 10, 2015

        I was referring to the fact that the Packers have no problem selling out Family Night, which is now a practice.

        No other team in the league would sell out their stadium for a practice. Only the Packers. And the Packers do it in like a week.

        I would give the Steelers a 65% full stadium for a practice with every other team in the league less than that.

  8. Taurean Davis July 9, 2015

    Well that’s a load of crap. We are the best fans in the u.s. if it’s about money. We don’t care about that (probably some do). We care and love our packers till the end. We love Lambeau and we own the team. If that’s not the definition of the best fans in the NFL is then I don’t know what is. This survey posses me off. It’s just pure stupidity that’s for sure

  9. Deepsky July 10, 2015

    It’s probably a good thing that the Cowboys are #1. In the late ’80s when the Cowboys were tanking and the TV ratings were dropping, the NFL decided to rig the system with the Hershel Walker trade, creating a Cowboys dynasty and screwing the Packers out of Emmitt Smith.

  10. MetsPackersRangers July 10, 2015

    The entire NFC East as a whole is the most overrated division ever in football. I grew up right in the middle where Gina’s and Eagirls fans coexist. So glad I left that shithole and never looked back. Yeah fuck the Cowboys and their fanbase. When you walk into a neighborhood bar and there’s 5 dickheads in Cowboys jerseys talking shit you just want to watch humanity die.

    1. rebelgb July 10, 2015

      “you just want to watch humanity die”

      I LOL’ed hard!


    2. MMTTDCSUCK July 10, 2015

      That last comment ruled . . .

  11. MetsPackersRangers July 10, 2015

    I know at least 5 dudes whom I see on Sundays during the NFL season cheering on the Cowboys. These dudes by the second half of the game are so shitfaced that they can’t even spell their own name. Every pre season same song same dance. I give one of them props because he’s actually from Texas. The other clowns? Oklahoma(he actively also cheers on the Yankees and has no connection to NY), the one guy has a speech problem, and the other dude is from the boondocks of South Carolina. They usually go to war with their fellow Giants fans friends are just as AWFUL….

  12. Andy July 10, 2015

    You know this study is completely laughable. I guess science didn’t take into account that “home” game the cowboys had against the 49ers where more than half the stadium was wearing red. But I guess all it takes to be a great fan is buying some crap, showing up to the games is irrelevant.

  13. 13Time1265 July 10, 2015

    Haha Cowgirl fans?! They cry all day when their crappy team loses. Living in Texas for a month is all I needed to figure that out. Packer fans are the most passionate because our team is in the smallest town of all of professional sports. 13 time champs!

  14. MetsPackersRangers July 11, 2015

    Those turds haven’t been relevant in nearly 20 years.