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Packers Have Finally Canned Shawn Slocum

Shawn Slocum

We have literally dreamed of this day. The day when the Green Bay Packers would fire their inept special teams coach, Shawn Slocum.

January 30, 2015 is the day that our dream came true.

Slocum, who coached the worst special teams unit in the NFL in 2014, is out.

The Packers released a statement from coach Mike McCarthy this afternoon.

“I would like to thank Shawn for all of his contributions over the past nine years,” McCarthy said in a statement. “He was a positive contributor to our success, including helping us win Super Bowl XLV. We wish Shawn, Michelle and their family the best moving forward.”

Blah, blah, blah.

Slocum has long been the weakest link on the Packers coaching staff, just as his units have consistently been a weak link for the Packers. His ultimate undoing was likely the NFC Championship game, where his most egregious error was calling for a field goal block while the Packers were leading Seattle 16-0.

When the Seahawks ran a fake, which they did because of Brad Jones’ tendency to overaggressively go for the block, the Packers were ill prepared and the play resulted in an easy touchdown. That would prove to be the beginning of the end for Green Bay in that game.

This was just one blight on a record filled with miscues, mistakes and fuck ups by Slocum and his units, though.

We’ve gone over this fact time and time again. If Slocum had performed any other job in any other place in the manner he did as special teams coach of the Packers for the past five years, he would have been unemployed a long time ago.

Unfortunately for us, and fortunately for him, Slocum has long been a good friend of McCarthy’s. They started as graduate assistants at Pitt and Slocum has been in Green Bay with McCarthy since he was hired in 2006.

However, you could tell something was up earlier this week at McCarthy’s season-ending press conference. He was asked directly about Slocum and offered no vote of confidence.

Although we shouldn’t have to do this in a performance-based work environment, we’re still going to commend McCarthy for finally doing the right thing and getting rid of someone who wasn’t performing. It must suck to fire one of your friends, but that just goes to show you probably shouldn’t have hired him to begin with.

Regardless, the deed is FINALLY done and we’re ready to celebrate.

First round is on me!

Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.



  1. rebelgb January 30, 2015

    Finally. Now Mccarthy needs to hire an offensive coordinator who will get along well with Rodgers and those 2 can manager our play calling and time clock management.

  2. packers5 January 30, 2015

    one down two too go

  3. TDM January 30, 2015


  4. Fritz January 30, 2015

    hopefully this development is the result of mgmt. listening to the fans, whom they well know are the best, most intelligent, most supportive [OF WINNING PERFORMANCE] in all pro sports on this or any other planet. because they know when a loss is due to a well played and coached team suffering the last bad break, or understandable mistake vs. a well coached and good playing opp., and this kind of loss, and many of the other “inexplicable” losses on this coaching crew’s resume, that packer fans have painfully attended, no? in a nutshell: mgmt., i.e. the suits in the WH, er, GB house HEAR US, THEY KNOW THERE ARE LIMITS TO WHAT WE CAN, AND SHOULD HAVE TO, ENDURE!

    1. Savage57 January 31, 2015

      This reads like the disjointed manifesto of a fucking lunatic.

      You recused yourself from that ‘most intelligent’ group of fans appellation.

      1. Shawn Neuser January 31, 2015

        Tru dat.

        Anyone who begins posting at a prolific rate only after a big Packer loss is dubious from the get go.

        1. Fritz fm WI February 1, 2015

          i have been much more prolific before this latest meltdown actually, as you should well know.

      2. Fritz fm WI February 2, 2015

        your second sentence indicates you don’t know what “recused” means, revealing an impaired reading level [7th grade?], or more likely, a limited core vocabulary masked by a larger verbal one, i.e., you have heard and speak more english words than you actually understand.

        1. Fritz fm WI February 2, 2015

          maybe savage57 can provide a heads up for us before we peruse his malaprop-ridden posts by using an alias like “heinz57”

    2. Phatgzus February 1, 2015

      “…most supportive (OF WINNING PERFORMANCE)”
      Really? That is the very defin out tion of bandwaggoning, and true football fans (Packers fans), by their very definition are so far beyond that theyre not even on the same plane of existence. You sound real supportive of winning with your recent comments. If you’re so gung ho about having perfect seasons each and every year, why not become a fan of Jeff Fisher’s avant guarde, offensive juggernaut Rams team? Oh that, right, because you’ve been a paragon of eruditic, stalwart Packers fandom since the Roaring ‘ 20s, except for the 70s and 80s of course.

      1. Fritz fm WI February 2, 2015

        by “winning performance” i mean a performance that gives a competitor, due to maximum effort, prep, and hard work, his/their best chance of WINNING based on their raw talent. of course luck has something to do with it as well as other factors, e.g., if you saw the australian open tennis final early yesterday morning, you would probably conclude that, altho andy murray lost the championship match to a more talented opponent, at least more skilled at this time in their careers, he clearly acquitted himself well, as he demonstrated that he had clearly maximized his best winning chances to date, and that it was a true “winning performance” to take with him into future major tennis championships, i.e., he is maturing into the best possible world class contender that he can possibly be, even if he has been paired at times with a more gifted opponent. i hope my tennis analogy makes clear to you the gist of my post above, and this from a djokovic fan [clearly not on andy murray’s bandwagon either].

  5. the real russ letlow January 30, 2015

    it is all for naught if we don’t hire a capable ST coach.

  6. pf4l January 30, 2015

    Well fuck me Melanie Collins…Someone in Green Bay was held accountable!!


  7. Howard January 30, 2015

    It was appropriate and late in coming.

  8. disposable hero January 30, 2015

    So Happy I was wrong about the Pack not firing this turd…albeit first years too late.

  9. Cheese January 30, 2015

    About fucking time. Good riddance..

  10. Richard January 30, 2015

    Was it something he said??

  11. InFact January 30, 2015

    If I’m MM, I’m reminding Slocum BEFORE the FG that Slocum should NOT be rushing and should be conceding the FG.

    But no. MM trusted Slocum. Oops.

  12. UpNorth January 30, 2015

    Well, that’s step one of the four changes I wanted to see this year. Next one is sign Bulaga and Cobb. Then get a nice new aggressive MLB in the draft. Then wrap it all up by getting a nice new offensive coordinator to take play calling duties. (Last one wont happen but should)

  13. E. Wolf January 30, 2015

    He ought to have been fired after 2010. I hope this is the beginning of a successful revamping process that will prevent the Collapse in Seattle from having long term adverse ramifications (as such disasters had for the Oilers, the Bills, the Cubs in 69 and later after Steve Bartmann etc)

  14. 13TIME1265 January 31, 2015

    I would say keep Clements and boot Capers. Capers has lost his edge, Way to comfortable or he has memory loss.

  15. Mason Crosby January 31, 2015

    I’m going to miss him.. He used to give Tim and I the best oral during ST meetings..
    I’ll miss the way Goode stood in the corner and watched, kinda sexy to have someone watch.

  16. Bobby D January 31, 2015

    Hallefuckingleujah….best news since Ray Rhodes got shit canned. Now cut Hawk, B Jones, fire Dom, get an OC and get the white owl to bring Cobb back and load up at ILB. Will make the pain of watching this fucking SB and living through mock drafts for the next 5 months slightly more bearable.

    1. Fritz February 2, 2015

      Yeah, this SB was like watching two AFC teams playing each other for OUR Lombardi. Until the wacky final half minute of joy, capped off with a fun scrum and ejection of a classless clown on a team of dorks coached by a turd.

      Anybody else stay for the final min. ? What was your favorite moment? Was it watching twice the pain on PC’s face as the joy that gargoyle ejaculated during OUR “miraculous” interception 2 years in the making? In any event, this will go down as the wackiest finale of ANY SB to date.

      1. Fritz February 2, 2015

        R Wilson goes,down in history AGAIN: 1sr as the only QB ever to throw a game winning interception.
        2nd – from HAIL MARY to FAIL MARY to BAIL MARY.

  17. Organicbuzz January 31, 2015

    Time to cut Brad Jones as well. Go Pack Go!!! nowhere to go but up after shitting the fuckin bed in Seattle. Whole fuckin Team needs to take a paycut.

  18. Tedtomato January 31, 2015

    How that guy ever got that job is beyond me!! Must have really good oral skills..i just wish they could recoup all the money that they paid that fucking turd!!

  19. Shawn Neuser January 31, 2015

    This sets a very high bar for the remainder of our assistant coaches.
    They know now that all it would take for them to be fired is to have their unit finish dead last in the league AND then practically single-handedly lose the NFC Championship game.
    Wow, those coaches must be walking on eggshells now.

    1. Fritz fm WI February 1, 2015

      the remainder? isn’t MM actually playing OC? instead of doing his [nominal] job of HC? and isn’t the OC an assistant position? ergo, aren’t you actually trying to convince your subconscious that MM should fire himself if he doesn’t meet that “very high bar” that you fantasize has suddenly appeared “out of the mouths of babes” in GB’s “remainder of assistant coaches”? LOL.