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Minnesota Vikings: Still Awesome

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Minnesota Vikings beat the Atlanta Falcons on Sunday. That probably just means the Falcons aren’t nearly as good as we thought. The Vikings, however, are still totally awesome!

Not on the field, of course. They’ll always suck there. Kind of like in the stands where their “fans” sit. It’s as if god vomited ignorant douchebag into a bowl and that bowl was TCF Bank Stadium on Sundays.

But I digress. How awesome are the Minnesota Vikings?

So frickin’ awesome that they’re still selling jerseys of known child abuser Adrian Peterson at their games.

For full price, no less!

Adrian Peterson jerseys for sale

Adrian Peterson jerseys for sale

Note that there is kid actually wearing a Peterson jersey right in the lower middle of that second photo. Because why would a parent not want to support Vikings great Adrian Peterson by allowing their son to wear Peterson’s jersey?

Boy, no reason that I can think of.

“Duuuuuuh, I’ll take the Peterson jersey and wear it with pride! Skol Vikings! Mrahhhh!”

Meanwhile, you have to wonder how that conversation went inside the organization.

“Yeah, so, we got all these Adrian Peterson jerseys…”

“Maybe we should pull them from the team store.”

“Now, let’s not forget that we have the most ignorant fan base in the league. We could literally put a picture of a can of Hormel Chili on a purple shirt and they would buy it. In fact, that’s a great idea. Let’s get those Hormel shirts into production right away! Boy, am I suddenly hungry. Excuse me. I need to find a can opener. Oh, and please send out for a sixer of Hamm’s right away. I will require a beer refreshing with my chili.”

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Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

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12 Comments

  1. Cheese September 29, 2014

    The fuck?? Who gives shit if his jerseys are still on the shelf. That doesn’t mean anyone is buying them. And just because someone has an old peterson jersey doesn’t mean they support child abuse. This Hormel chili thing is getting pretty lame as well.

    1. the real jeff ircink September 29, 2014

      what Cheese & Salazar stated. you’re stretching, TP (did you know that also stands for “toilet paper”?). also – legally – AP was charged with reckless child injury. very different from “child abuse” – legally and penalty-wise. go back to law school.

  2. Salazar September 29, 2014

    Jerseys support the team, not just the player. We’re not talking about the NBA here. Not every kid’s parents are rushing out to the store to buy them a new jersey every time their favorite player does something stupid. Weak article.

  3. Zwoeger September 29, 2014

    Well they did have something to cheer about. I mean even Ponder was happy with Bridgewater,
    And his mom of course. Bet he will run against our Packs the hell out of it . Probably even Brady will get a career high too.

  4. Deepsky September 29, 2014

    Given Capers historical record facing unknown QBs who can run, Vikings fans are probably going to be claiming the Lombardi trophy after this Thursday.

  5. MaxMax September 29, 2014

    Good to see not all GB fans are this… bizarre. Saw the article title through Google news and thought it was a misprint or something. Apparently not get a grip haha

  6. justin September 29, 2014

    Man you guys need a hobby. I mean come on this is truely pathetic

  7. Sheepshit September 29, 2014

    Ahman Green was arrested three different times for beating the shit out of three different women while with the Packers (google it). He never missed a game. He was inducted into the Packers Hall of Fame a few months ago. The person who runs this site is a pathetic individual.

  8. Hmmmmm September 29, 2014

    Peterson jerseys for sale next to the “youth” section… Maybe they should “switch” that!

  9. TyKo Seamboat September 30, 2014

    why do people wear jerseys anyway??? I don’t understand it. One of the most sporting & feminine things a grown man can do.

  10. Fresher than Wonder Bread September 30, 2014

    Tyko, I’ve never thought about it in that way but you kinda make sense there…

  11. Don Q September 30, 2014

    Yeah, why is it that 85% of the people at sporting events wear jerseys? Fucking unfathomable!