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Jim Caldwell is the Detroit Lions New Coach

Jim Caldwell

Only the Detroit Lions could Detroit Lions their search for a new coach. Ultimately, they landed Baltimore Ravens offensive coordinator and former Indianapolis Colts coach Jim Caldwell.

The Leos actually sent a private jet for San Diego Chargers offensive coordinator and former Arizona Cardinals coach Ken Whisenhunt yesterday. He didn’t get on it and instead agreed to be the Tennessee Titans new head coach.

So what did the Lions do? Panic! And then hire Caldwell.

After getting canned by the Colts following the 2011 season (he was 26-22), Caldwell became the quarterbacks coach of Baltimore. During their Super Bowl season, Caldwell replaced Cam Cameron as offensive coordinator.

He worked in that role this past season as well. The Ravens finished 29th in total offense in 2013.

So, a couple things here.

First, the Lions let quarterback Matthew Stafford sit in on their interviews for head coaching candidates. You know, because Butterball knows what it takes to be a good head coach in the NFL.

Second, Lions fans are less than excited by the Caldwell hire. That’s right, I actually know a few of them. They had the misfortune of being born in Detroit, so what are you going to do?

Anyway, they’re all pissing and moaning today.

Frankly, we totally understand. This hire should relegate the Leos to third or fourth place in the North for the next five years.

Now, if the Vikings would just rehire Brad Childress, we’d be all set.

Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.



  1. Dick Trickle "33" January 14, 2014

    Gamesmanship abounds!

  2. Skinny January 14, 2014

    Millen must still be on the payroll. Just a terrible decision by the Lions front office, my god, think it through guys.

    1. Chad Lundberg January 14, 2014

      You have a problem with two guaranteed victories a year? Sheesh, I’ll take it bub!

      1. Skinny January 14, 2014

        Happy about it for the Packers sake, but jesus. Professional people running an NFL organization thought Jim Caldwell is the man for this job. Im sure hes a good man, but damn, think it through before hiring a guy just to hire a guy.

  3. therealChuckywasCecil January 14, 2014

    Now if the Vikes would just hire Bevill, off season hires would be complete.

    1. Skinny January 14, 2014

      True man, this could end up being the gift that keeps on giving for the Packers this year. At least the Vikings are taking their time though.

  4. Iltarion January 14, 2014

    Allegedly the Lions asked Wayne Fontes, and he told them to go fuck themselves.

    Does this mean no more thugalicious in D-troi??

    Because D-troi would not be D-troi without some thuggery.

  5. FITZCORE1252 January 14, 2014

    This pleases me.

    I was concerned they may land Wisensack, but, they’re the FUCKING lions. Ahahaha

  6. buster bluth January 14, 2014

    Disappointing. I was hoping they would go into full melt down and hire Tom Cable

  7. Remedy January 14, 2014

    Stoked they fucked up with Whisenhunt. Dude is too good to be coaching an offense with that much potential. Could have changed that team around

    Felt for a long time now that Whisenhunt was one of the most underrated people in football

  8. Ryan January 14, 2014

    Im from Michigan and listen to the local sports talk radio guys everyday. Of the two most listened to guys in the area One is pissed and hates the hire, the other is talking playoffs. One thing is for sure, by September every Lions fan will be guaranteeing division championship. Has happened every year all my life, Lions fans are some of the most unintelligent football people you could dream of meeting.

  9. Big B January 14, 2014

    Dude makes Lovie Smith look zany and animated.
    Great hire for the Pack.

  10. rebelgb January 14, 2014


    The Lions are funny.

    To all the asshats on this site who critisize the Packer front office relentlessly; how about you be a Lion fan…..??