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Time Out: Kelly Hall is Dancing the Cha Cha

Kelly Hall dancing

We tend to enjoy the exploits of Kelly Hall, especially when she’s doing classy things like keg stands and shit. If you’re somehow unaware, Kelly Hall and her big, fake tits are the girlfriend of Detroit Lions quarterback Matthew Stafford.


Earlier this week, this video hit. It’s Kelly Hall in some sort of ballroom dancing deal called Dancing With the All-Stars. No, not Dancing With the Stars. Dancing With the ALL-STARS.

How is Kelly Hall an All-Star? Who the hell knows?

Maybe at swallowing cheap booze and… well, we won’t go there. But this has to be some sort of Detroit thing because where else would she be an All-Star?

Maybe in a porno.


Disney presumably had something to do with this too, since you can see a pretty large Mickey Mouse in the background. Oh yeah, and Kelly Hall dances the cha cha in a tiny blue dress.

So, for you enthusiasts…

More Kelly Hall here, here and here.

Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.



  1. E. Wolf August 15, 2013

    I sent Monty this–not sure if he saw it before.

    As for this being sanctioned by the Mouse, I guess I should no longer marvel that stripper heels and a dress raised right to the hoo-haw are somehow Disney-fare Perhaps what is surprising is that the young woman is actually of age.
    Despite the fake tits, which exemplify subtraction by addition, Stafford is a lucky guy, especially if she keeps a nice, trim lady garden.. Now that’s good eatin’!

  2. PF4L August 15, 2013

    lol…..I guess if you are pretty, have blond hair, fake tits, and blow an NFL QB…That makes you a star(?). What’s next, a visit to the White House?

    1. Abe Frohman August 16, 2013

      To be fair, she’s only going to blow him until they’re married.

    2. Phatgzus August 16, 2013

      A visit? Nah, more like a tenure; say hello to the next ruler of the free world.

  3. Iltarion August 15, 2013

    This is far from an all-star performance. She nearly fell on her ass during the first spin, and she had all sorts of issues with the coupling.

    Her partner is practically wearing a “I’m gay as hell” neon sign.

    Worst of all, her best assets were not on display.