Chicago Bears quarterback and lead mouth breather, Jay Cutler, has some new digs.
The apartment department at TMZ tells us Cutler is shelling out $6,100 a month for his new pad, presumably approved by his old lady, Kristin Cavallari. Yeah, he’s renting, not buying. Why would you want to buy a piece of prime real estate when you’re making $30 million?
This Cutler/Cavallari demon spawn is going to be a boon to society, mostly due to its brilliance. At least it will look good… except for the double chin and mouth breathing.
Here are the highlights of the Cutler penthouse:
Take a look.
Sweet, a panoramic city view of all the buildings taller than yours.
How metro-sexual. Where’s the 80″ LED and PS3? An off white couch? Bound to be skid marks on that. What a hand job this clown is. He’s rubbing it in to all of the shit eating Bear fans. “Look at me!!” “I get to eat shit in my prime luxury apartment!!” “I get to eat shit with my moderately hot, but soon to be fat and bitchy woman” “I am your God common shit eater Bear Fan!!!”
This is obviously a furnished apartment whose decor was picked out by a stuffy 60 year old lady…
or the grand-kid that got the stuff in the will didn’t bother coming for the furniture after the previous tenant kicked the bucket.
that couldn’t be it. It’s way more fun to assume that Cutler is just a pussy.
I didn’t know that looking at tall buildings was better than looking at short buildings. So if I look at tall buildings I’ll be a better Packer fan, noted. Thanks for the great inspirational info Asimov. I live in Minneapolis, are those buildings tall enough?
I remain completely flummoxed by the mysterious presence of this article.
It is a mystery inside a riddle inside an enigma.
ONLY A BUNCH OF FUCKING BUTT PACKER FANS WOULD TRY TO CHASTISE AN UNBORN CHILD. YOU SHOULD ALL BE SO PROUD OF YOURSELF. HOWEVER I HAVE A SUGGESTION FOR EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU BUTT PACKING MOTHERFUCKERS….WHY DON’T YOU ALL LIGHT YOURSELF ON FIRE AND BURN IN HELL!! YOU WOULD BE DOING YOURSELF A FAVOR ANYHOW. THE WORLD WOULD BE A BETTER PLACE WITHOUT PEOPLE LIKE YOU! EVERYONE HATES YOU, EVEN YOUR OWN MOTHERS! IT’S ONLY BECA– — USE YOU CHEER FOR A GAY TEAM THOUGH. YOU HAVE TIME TO CONVERT OVER TO A WINNING TEAM BEFORE YOU LOSE EVERYONE YOU LOVE IN YOUR LIFE! SO YOU SHOULD HURRY BEFORE EVEN YOUR DOG HATES YOU! THE GREEN BAY PACKERS WILL GO 5-11 THIS YEAR, MARK MY WORDS BUTT PACKING MOTHERFUCKERS….
Lol at “LIFELONGBEARSFAN.” Turn off your caps bro you look like an assclown.
That said, Cutlers pad looks nice and I wouldn’t complain if I were forced to live in an identical flat.