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Cutler And Cavallari Will Pollute World With Child [Photos]

Jay Cutler and Kristin Cavallari

Oh! The great news just keeps coming!

Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler, who obviously had too much free time while he wasn’t playing quarterback for his team down the stretch, has managed to impregnate fiancee Kristin Cavallari.

“We are thrilled to announce we are expecting our first child together,” they told PEOPLE. “It’s an amazing time in our life and we can’t wait to meet the new addition to our growing family.”

Here are several things we expect this new human to be, based on what the traits of his or her parents: useless, talentless a mouth breather and a quitter. We also expect the child to have a double chin or perhaps no chin at all.

Anyway, since KCav is going to be packing on the pounds pretty soon, we may as well take one last look at her ass.

Monty McMahon

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.



  1. TGIM January 23, 2012

    Can’t wait to see this turd pout when he doesn’t get what he wants at Toys R Us.

  2. PackerBob January 24, 2012

    Fuck da Bears!

  3. Jack January 24, 2012

    I doubt Cutler could impregnate this “female” on his own….therefore the offspring might turn out alright – probably messed up, but alright….seriously; who’s the dad: the poolcleaner, the pizza guy or ARod (just to show Cutler who’s the king of the hill….)????????

    Oh yeah and…Fuck the Bears

  4. Four Lombardi's January 24, 2012

    She’s obviously in it for the money.

  5. Ron Mexico January 24, 2012

    the kid will be born with 4 chins

  6. Mark April 22, 2012

    Fudge fans are so pathetic, attacking a child that hasn’t even been born yet. Get a life. At the end of the day, he lives in Chicago and you all live in that shit hole of a state known as Wisconsin.