Running back Ian Johnson has lived out my dream.
You may remember Johnson as the guy who proposed to his cheerleader girlfriend immediately after he scored the winning two-point conversion (on a Statue of Liberty play) in Boise State’s upset over Oklahoma in the 2007 Fiesta Bowl.
But that isn’t the reason. And it isn’t because Johnson is some sort of cult hero for putting Boise State on the college football map. It isn’t even because Johnson is getting a chance to play in the NFL.
In fact, Johnson plays for the Minnesota Vikings, and that is the dream of no man with two fully-functioning testicles.
No, Johnson lived out my dream by taking out Vikings’ coach Brad Childress.
Here’s how it went down.
“I’m just running my route and my eyes are always fixed on the quarterback. So as I’m getting width I don’t know what’s coming. I trust the quarterback that he’s not going to throw me into a headache.
“I got hit by something and go up over my feet, end over end. I did a flip. My first instinct was, ‘Oh, I’m going to hurt whoever this was because someone just cheap-shotted me.’ I look up and I see it’s Coach Childress. He’s on the ground and I’m like, ‘Oh no, that’s my ticket out of here.’ You don’t do that to the head man.
“I sat there for about two seconds and he popped up and said, ‘Oh, I’m sorry. That’s my fault.’ I was like, ‘Whew, maybe I’m not out of here.’”
The media was not present that day of OTAs, but witnesses say it was a major collision and that both Childress and Johnson were lucky to escape serious injury.
“We hit hard,” Johnson said. “He had a bruise. I had a contusion on my knee for a while. I hit him right on his inner thigh and knee cap.”
Yes, it’s unfortunate Childress wasn’t seriously injured. And frankly, that’s where Johnson living out my dream to its full extent falls a little short.
In fact, instead of just running, I think I’d prefer to be driving something like a Hummer when I run over that pedophile.
Ha! Too bad Childress, Brett, AD, and Jared Allen weren’t having a tea party at the time the Hummer hit!