Yeah, we know. Jared Allen can play football.
He can also take douchebaggery to new heights, and he’s done it once again.
We know about the mullet, we know about the red-neckery, we know about the nonsense that comes out of his mouth on a regular basis. In fact, we detailed this in our first ever Get to Know a Viking segment. But we didn’t know about the Jared Allen clothing line.
That’s right – the Jared Allen clothing line.
What, pray tell might you find in said clothing line? Well, totally awesome stuff like mullet shirts, “Got Strange” shirts and this beauty below, which is called “Sax Machine.” You know, it says Sax instead of Sex. Get it?
I mean, that’s totally frickin’ awesome, right?
Actually, no. It’s douche, you douchebag, Jared Allen. Only in Minnesota and possibly Alabama would you be able to get away with something so stupid.
In honor of Allen’s continued douchery, we bring you one of the original Total Packers videos. Enjoy.
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Oh shut UP. Shut up!!! Is that for real? I just threw up in the back of my mouth.
That guy is pretty sweet, he should open up his own restaurant with a catchy named based off the number on his jersey
maybe the vikings will have a special deal…….When you buy the brett favre football u get jared allens tshit for free……….fuck whats next adrian peterson jockstraps?
Don’t forget about the DUIs.
Jared Allen is a funny dude. Why the sour grapes? This type of stuff would never sell in Green Bay. (Rolls eyes)
So it’s safe to assume he’s about to sodomize that bull right?
whew, now i know what to get everyone at totalpackers for xmas this year