The Green Bay Packers Are Bad

There, I said it. The Green Bay Packers are bad, and it’s depressing.

It’s become pretty apparent why the Green Bay Packers are bad, too, after a 31-24 loss to the Cincinnati Bengals at Lambeau Field. This is a Bengals team that scored seven points last week against the Denver Broncos. That’s seven points against what is going to be one of the worst teams in the NFL. On Sunday, this juggernaut comes into Lambeau Field and rolls up 31 points on the Packers.

I am fucking incredulous.

Beside myself.

Here are the issues.

Aaron Rodgers should take a lot of blame for this loss. Every time Rodgers dropped back in the pocket, he was dancing around. It looked like he forgot how to set his feet and deliver a throw.

Drop back – hop, hop, hop, hop some more, hop and throw.

Not only did Rodgers not set and throw properly, he held onto the ball way too long, Rodgers was sacked six times. On most of those plays, he had plenty of time to get the ball off.

I’ll say it again, plenty of time to get the ball off. It was frustrating to watch.

Instead of throwing the ball, or throwing the ball away, Rodgers let Antwan Odom have a career day. Odom sacked Rogers five times. This is a game Odom will tell his kids about.

Antwan fucking Odom won’t get five more sacks the rest of the year. This is a guy who racked up a monstrous three sacks last year. A real terrorizor of quarterbacks.

Even though Rodgers spent a good portion of the game pussyfooting around, that’s not to say the Packers’ offensive line played well. In fact, I wouldn’t wipe my ass with the offensive line if I were out of toilet paper.

Daryn Colledge got abused after he was forced to move to left tackle when Chad Clifton sprained his ankle. Hey, Ted Thompson, do you think it’s maybe time to find a left tackle who can make it through a season? You know, a tackle who isn’t 33 years old?

Colledge’s shitty play comes a week after Allen Barbre got continually smoked by the Chicago Bears Adewale Ogunleye.

Not that those two assholes are alone in sucking at their jobs.

The line allowed the totally imposing Bengals defense to pitch a tent in the Packers backfield all game.

Rodgers has been sacked 10 times in the first two games – the most in the first two games of the season since 1992.

That’s fucking joke.

The running game? Also a joke.

Ryan Grant, the stud that he is, piled up a massive 46 yards on Sunday. He averaged 3.3 yards per carry.

If the Packers can trade Grant back to the New York Giants for a wheel of cheese, they should do it while he still has some value. Cheese is good. Ryan Grant sucks donkey balls.

While I am pissing all over the Packers, I would be remiss if I didn’t bring up the defense.

You know, that dominating unit that intercepted Jay Cutler four times last week? Remember them?

I don’t.

If it wasn’t for Charles Woodson’s two interceptions – one of which he returned for a touchdown – I could of sworn there wasn’t a defense on the field.

Dom Capers couldn’t find a way to put any pressure on Carson Palmer. If it wasn’t for Cullen Jenkins owning the Bengals offensive line on one play, and Palmer falling down on another, the Packers would have registered zero sacks on the day.

While Rodgers was dancing around all day, Palmer dropped back in the pocket and acted like an NFL quarterback. Palmer was able to act like an NFL quarterback because he had all day to throw. No one on the Packers defense, save for Clay Matthews, was near Palmer for most of the game.

I could go on, but I’m tired.

Unfortunately, there isn’t a quick fix for the Packers. Unfortunately, this team doesn’t look that good. Those Super Bowl dreams you had? Not going to happen this year.

The way the Packers played on Sunday against the Bengals, they’ll be lucky to get another win this season.

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