Posts tagged Chicago Bears

Packers Trounce Bears, All is Well

Jordy Nelson

Everything is well in Green Bay. The Green Bay Packers trounced the Chicago Bears 38-17, just like old times. Great passing game, no defense at all.

Predictions: Green Bay Packers at Chicago Bears

Smokin' Jay Cutler

Can the Green Bay Packers stay out of a 1-3 hole? Can the Chicago Bears assert themselves as the class of the NFC North? Here’s how we’re picking Sunday’s game.

Meanwhile, Chicago Bears are Fighting Amongst Themselves

Martellus Bennett and Kyle Fuller

On Monday, Chicago Bears tight end Martellus Bennett slammed teammate Kyle Fuller to the ground. On Tuesday, he got suspended by the team. Implosion!

Jay Cutler is a Pig

Jay Cutler the pig

Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler — Cutty! — has ceased to be a cat and has now transformed himself into a pig. We found him at the Ozaukee County Fair.

Jay Cutler is Winning the MVP

Jay Cutler: Cutty!

We’ve gotten some inside information from Brandon Marshall and now we can surely say that Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is winning the MVP this year. Cutty!

Jay Cutler’s Sweet-Ass Ride

Jay Cutler: sweet-ass ride

Everyone’s favorite quarterback, Cutty! rolled up to practice in a totally badass conversion van yesterday. Check out Jay Cutler’s sweet-ass ride!

Chicago Bears Already Planning Championship Parade

Chicago Bears coach Marc Trestman working the combine

The Chicago Bears are going to win the Super Bowl this season, so it makes complete sense that they’d already have their championship parade planned out.

Greatest Play in Green Bay Packers History?

Charles Martin

ESPN is running a poll on the greatest play in Green Bay Packers history. Of course, they’ve got it all wrong. We all know what the greatest play in Packers history is.

Why the Chicago Bears Suck

Chicago Bears meme

The Chicago Bears suck. How do they suck? Let us count the ways why this 2014 version of the Bears will suck just like every other version since 1985.

Chicago Bears Fans are Criminals

Chicago Bears fan

We’ve always believed it to be true. Now it’s been proven as fact. Chicago Bears fans are criminals. So says a scientific study from UC Berkeley.

The Bears Were After Mike Neal

Mike Neal sacks Jake Locker

The Chicago Bears were after Green Bay Packers outside linebacker Mike Neal in free agency. Much like on the field, they ultimately failed. Here’s the story.

Matt Forte is Tired of Losing to the Green Bay Packers, Dammit!

Matt Forte

Chicago Bears running back Matt Forte had plenty to say as the team opened OTAs today. Most notably, that he’s sick of losing to the Green Bay Packers.

Brandon Marshall Signed New Contract on a Chick Show

Brandon Marshall on The View

The Chicago Bears just gave receiver Brandon Marshall a fat new extension. Where did he sign that extension? On a TV show for chicks who don’t work.

Let’s Grade These NFL Draft Classes!

Teddy Bridgewater at the NFL Draft: total ecstasy

It’s time to grade the 2014 NFL Draft classes because why not? The event is over. That’s reason enough to grade something. Plus, our grades are spot on!

Here We Learn What Jay Cutler is Like in the Sack

80s Jay Cutler

Today we check in on the continuing zany adventures of Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. Cutty! So, Horse Face, what is Cutty! like in the sack? Do tell.

Minnesota Vikings Fans: Jared Allen is a Trader

Jared Allen: trader

Minnesota Vikings fans have managed to outdo themselves once again. They’re furious that Jared Allen signed with the Bears. To them, he’s a “trader.”

Jared Allen: Obviously Not Concerned About Winning

Jared Allen fucks sheep

Free agent defensive end Jared Allen signed with the Chicago Bears today. That’s a clear sign that he doesn’t give two craps about winning. Go Bears!

Here’s a Chicago Bears Fan Burning his Julius Peppers Jersey

Chicago Bears fan burns Julius Peppers jersey

They’re real angry that Julius Peppers left the Chicago Bears and signed with the Green Bay Packers. At least this idiot is. Watch him burn his jersey.

Anybody Want Devin Hester in Green Bay?

Devin Hester

There’s a rumor that the Green Bay Packers are interested in Devin Hester if his asking price drops. Does that make sense? Well, all kinds of it. Here’s why.

So Julius Peppers Doesn’t Play Hard All the Time

Julius Peppers

Everyone in Chicago has been quick to point out that new Green Bay Packer Julius Peppers doesn’t play hard all the time. Well, that shouldn’t really matter this year and here’s why.