Chicago Bears Already Planning Championship Parade

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Chicago Bears coach Marc Trestman working the combine

Chicago Bears coach Marc Trestman working the combine

As you probably already know, the Chicago Bears are winning the Super Bowl this year. Ask any Bears fans.

Also, go ahead and ask the coaching staff. Coach Marc Trestman, who’s going to die from AIDs at any moment now, has already planned out the team’s year, including their championship parade.

So says one Jay Cutler.

Cutty!

“Everything is planned out,” Cutler said. “The parade is planned out, the bus rides are planned out. He’s probably designing the rings by now.”

By the sound of it, Trestman did something similar last year. And we all know how that turned out.

Aaron Rodgers to Randall Cobb

Bahahahahahahahaha!

The Chicago Bears.

Suck.

Bags.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

12 Comments on "Chicago Bears Already Planning Championship Parade"

  1. Howard

    Next week Jordan Palmer or Jimmy Clausen are going to proclaim the 2014 Bears the “DREAM TEAM.” It worked great for Vince Young and the 2011 Eagles.

  2. RelampagoBlanco

    Being a Packers fan living behind enemy lines in Chicago, you all have no idea just how ridiculous this talk is. Every. Single. Year. And as expected every single year the Bears go on and do what the do best, finish just above or at .500.

  3. the real russ letlow

    I never get tired of watching that play. never. And Larry McCarren’s radio call. “He’s got Cobb…..YEEESSSS!!!!” is beautiful!

  4. I still don’t know which look on Cutlers face was the best. The one after he quit like a bitch in the NFC Championship game in 2010, or the one after the 48 yard TD pass last year. Each time there was Cutler, with that blank stupid look on his face. PRICELESS!

  5. Salazar

    To the Seahawks fans: it’s good to see you all enjoying your one moment in the sun with the exact same amount of class and poise we all expect from that Hipster Mecca shithole you live in. Enjoy it now, then go back to bashing your city’s team by this time next year because other than this championship, you have none of the legacy, integrity, and time-honored legitimacy as a truly great example of what’s right in the world of sports that us Packers fans take such pride in.

    As for the topic at hand: none of our division rivals give us very much actual competition anymore; but their blowhard fans’ illusions of grandeur still make it fun to beat them. Every single time. I live in La Crosse, where the only Chicago fans are the lowlifes who move here from the big city to peddle drugs and clog our bars with their criminality and bullshit attitudes. Beating their team shuts them up and keeps them at home for once so let’s just let the whole Bear nation keep setting itself up for agonizing disappointment yet again.

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