B.J. Raji

Alright, alright. We’re not really that enthusiastic about fat man, B.J. Raji. But there’s hope.

Last year, Raji was entering the final season of his contract. He actually — like a total moron — turned down $8 million per year during the season. If you had no more information, you’d probably figure, well, obviously this guy had a career year.

Nope. Worst season of fat man’s life! Fool managed only 19 tackles and registered no sacks for the second season in a row.

You or I could have put up that kind of production.

So after Raji heard crickets in free agency, he re-signed with the Green Bay Packers for one year and $4 million. So maybe he’ll get the memo this time around: you play your best football when you’re playing for a new contract.

Honestly, we don’t really care to speculate about that, but he didn’t get it last time, so why would he get it this time?

No, the reason there’s hope for Raji actually playing some football that you could term at least average is because he’s moving back to nose tackle. It’s his preferred position and the one he started his pro career at before playing primarily defensive end last year.

The Packers used Ryan Pickett, another non-factor, in the middle in 2013. He’s a free agent and clearly the Packers don’t want him back, so Raji’s fat ass will get a shot to line up over the center again.

“I’d say typical centers are squattier and you’re in a close proximity,” Raji said, “and if you’re able to defeat the blocker you’re in a direct line usually with the ball carrier or the quarterback or whatever. That’s a good fit for me.”

At this point, all we hear is “blah, blah, blah.” We’ll judge by the results.

The good news is Raji had his best season — 2010 — playing in the middle. He had 39 tackles and 6.5 sacks that year. He’s come nowhere close to those numbers since, but hey. This has got to be the year, right?