80s Jay Cutler

Meanwhile, we thought we should check in on the continuing adventures of Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. You know… Cutty!

What is old Cutty! up to this spring, other than not caring about anything, you ask? His usual zany hijinks of course!

Cutty!’s horse-faced wife Kristin Cavallari — or Kristin Cutty!, if you like — has given us the insight into what The Cutster is like in the sack that we’ve always wanted.

Old Hang Dog isn’t real fond of banging his pregnant wife, it seems. It’s not because she’s fat, mind you. It’s because he’s weirded out that his demon spawn is hanging about while he’s performing the old in-out.

“Sex is funny when you’re pregnant. Guys get weird about it,” Cavallari tells Fit Pregnancy‘s April/May issue.

“I’m like, ‘Oh Jay, the baby’s kicking!’ And he’s like, not wanting to know about it.”

Say it with me… Cutty! DOOOOOON’T CAAAAARE!

Here’s a question. Who makes small talk during sex? Obviously people who are enjoying themselves immensely.

“Hey, could you pass the Doritos?”