Jerome Felton: Minnesota Vikings hero

Alright, we don’t literally have a photo of him crying, just a story about him crying. Him is Minnesota Vikings fullback Jerome Felton and this stupid SOB got suspended by the league for four games because he violated the substance abuse policy.

Oh, and does he get dumber? You bet your ass!

He did so by getting arrested for DUI in a McDonald’s drive-thru. He gets the suspension because it was his second alcohol-related offense. So good work, there.

And now? He’s crying.

“Man, it hurts a lot,” Felton told USA TODAY Sports after the Vikings’ preseason finale on Thursday night. “I’ve shed tears about it. It’s embarrassing just for it coming back up.”

Then he went on to cry some more.

“I don’t cry about many things,” Felton said. “But I definitely shed tears when it’s dealing with all this stuff, just because you just feel like you’re letting people down.”


Of course you’re letting people down. You’re a Minnesota Viking. That’s what you do. You let an entire moronic fanbase down every year.