Percy Harvin

The Minnesota Vikings have traded their second-best player — receiver Percy Harvin — to the Seattle Seahawks. The Vikings will get a first and seventh-round pick this season and a mid-round pick in 2014, according to Jay Glazer.

Seattle just gave up a load (that reportedly includes a fat, new contract) for a malcontent, but what the hell do they care? They’re probably going to the Super Bowl in 2013 and they now have a legit No. 1 receiver. Oh, and Harvin will join another former Viking — Sidney Rice — in that receiving corp. That was a dangerous tandem in Minnesota that will probably be just as dangerous in Seattle.

The Vikings, on the other hand, get rid of a guy who didn’t want to play for them and demanded a trade. Why didn’t he want to play for the Vikings? Well, because they’re the fucking Vikings!

Only sheep fuckers like Jared Allen actually want to play for the Vikings.

So now the Vikings can go draft some more guys who don’t want to play for them. Not surprisingly, the last time they did something like this, they fucked up royally.

In 2005, the Vikings got a first and a seventh for Randy Moss. In brilliant fashion, the Vikings used that first-round pick on receiver Troy Williamson. He lasted three seasons with the team and was never a full-time starter. In his best season, Williamson had 455 receiving yards.

Maybe the Vikings can land another Troy Williamson this year!