Rodgers: I Love Jeff Saturday’s Ass!

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Scott Wells

No, this isn’t your typical Green Bay Packers news, but it’s pretty important nonetheless.

Aaron Rodgers loves center Jeff Saturday‘s ass. Scott Wells‘ too.

We know you’re intrigued, so we’ll explain. And don’t worry, Rodgers isn’t done slaying bitches. He did take some time to explain what makes an ideal center this past week, though.

Ass height and lack of ass sweat.

“There’s two main components that a center needs to have, and it’s not quickness or agility or snapping or anything,” Rodgers said. “It’s two things: One, he has to have a good height, and I’m talking about where his butt rests. It can’t be too low because I don’t wanna get deep in that stance and it can’t be too high so I feel like I’m standing up. It’s gotta be just right. [Jeff Saturday has] got that. … Scott Wells, my previous center [and] Jeff Saturday — great height. Great butt height. … And the second is most important, and that’s sweating. How much do they sweat? The worst thing that you can have is third, fourth quarter on a October day where it’s 65, 70 degrees and he’s sweating through his pants. Because that is not a situation you wanna be in.”

Okay, so Wells, Saturday — good. Who isn’t? Evan Dietrich-Smith.

Rodgers claims Dietrich-Smith sweats so much when he’s in the game he has to change his pants at halftime.

You think that’s a glandular problem?

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

11 Comments on "Rodgers: I Love Jeff Saturday’s Ass!"

  1. nurseratchett

    Who says there’s nothing going on in the NFL in May? Only the tools & fools who aren’t packer fans & don’t frequent totalpackers.com.

    Thanks for the ass height/ass sweat insight! Packer fans are truly the most educated in the league.

  2. Jack

    …Nurseratchett – Yeah, we cheeseheads got our assology down to an art form…that’s why we never talk out our assess.

    • nurseratchett

      Well said.

      I may have just came up with a name for my blog….. “Assology with Nurseratchett”…..

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  4. Savage57

    Who knew that of the many challenges a NFL QB faces among them would be dealing with another man’s nasty ass sweat for 3 hours.

    No wonder these guys make the big bucks.

  5. Pack Lethal

    I wouldn’t want to touch a football covered in ass sweat either. Well played Rodgers! Theres a lot more to the snap than meets the eye.

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