Another Ad For Lord Favre

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Brett Favre

I am your overlord! Buy Wrangler jeans!

Maybe it’s the 49 years of ineptitude. Maybe it’s having never won the Super Bowl. Maybe it’s the inferiority complex instilled by the success of their eastern neighbor, the Green Bay Packers.

Actually, who am I kidding? It’s all of these things that make Minnesota Vikings fans who they are.

And so, you get shit like this. You all remember the idiotic billboard some Vikings fans took out for Lord Brett Favre urging him to come back for one more season with the Vikings. Well, now another idiot Vikings fan has taken out a full-page ad in Monday’s Hattiesburg American newspaper urging Favre to come back.

What’s that smell? You got it. It’s the stench of desperation.

“Oh, please Lord Favre, come back and save us from our years of suckitude. Come back and make us look like real football fans for another year. We love you Lord Favre!”

Actually, the ad doesn’t say that. It is reportedly an open letter to Lord and Savior Favre that ends with this.

“Brett Favre, thanks man. Rest up … then come on back. Sincerely, a Vikings fan.”

The ad was placed by Benjamin Nelms, a 39-year-old who designs cancer therapy products and lives in Madison. Yeah, Madison…

If you live in Madison, I highly encourage you to ferret this rat out and drive him either A. out of our fine state, or B. into Lake Mendota.

Nelms says he paid about twice what season tickets cost for the ad, which is a brilliant investment. And his hope?

“I don’t want to guilt him into coming back. I don’t want him to read it and say, ‘Oh, no,’ ” Nelms said. “But I hope that if he’s on the fence, this can be a piece of wind that pushes him back onto our side.”

Well, he got one thing right. The best path to take in this case is to feed Lord Favre’s giant ego.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

38 Comments on "Another Ad For Lord Favre"

  1. Anita

    Wouldn’t his money be better served donating to a cancer charity, since he works in that field? Hell, he could make the donation in the Lord and Savior’s name if he’s that much of a nut swinging Vikings fan.

    It’s not as tacky as a bunch of Viking fans throwing their money away on a billboard the same week as the Red Cross is begging for money to help people in Haiti, but it’s close.

  2. Vikes2championship

    I remember when packer fans couldn’t move on since there god came to Minnesota and had his best statistical year with a team he spent 1year with and not 17. What favre does is Viking fans bussiness and you shouldn’t care unless you are still sour about him going to your rival team! Get over it and worry about your own team!

  3. mike

    Love it. Every time a queens article graces this fine site, some poor spelling mongloid drops in to prove how right we are. You know how many vikes web sites I’ve been to? 0. That answer is true for every other gbp fan on this site. Please leave, we are right. No need for a debate.

  4. Symon

    Why do packerfans hate brett favre so much and yes im a Vikes fan but one thing i dont understand is why would a football fan talk so bad about a player that has done so much for thier franchise after the team let him go he didnt wanna leave he just wanted to play the game that he loves and if thats what fans do then i cant see how any of us high school athletes would want to ever play for a team that treats its greats with such hostility well thanks for gutting alot of young boys idle

  5. Al Borland's Beard

    Symon, if you think Favre is just some good ol’ southern boy who only wants to toss the pigskin, you’re as naive as all the Viking fans who didn’t believe Favre would ultimately choke away their season.

    He wanted off the Packers because Thompson wouldn’t cave in to every one of his demands (Like Brad and Groucho Marx over there in MN) so he pulled the whole cry, retire, cry some more hoping for a release (The same thing he did with the Jets, only they didn’t give a shit) and of course Thompson didn’t trade him to the Vikings or release him, that would be career suicide.

    He should’ve just bent over for the land baron like everyone in MN already has.

  6. Al Borland's Beard

    Oh, and Vikes2Championship, you might want to consider changing your name as the Vikings have proven that isn’t happening anytime soon.

  7. Hey Symon, Brett retired from the Packers after years of publicly considering it. That’s a funny way of convincing them “he just wanted to play the game he loves.”

    The hostility comes from the Packer/viking rivalry. Suppose your high school’s star quarterback set school records his first three years, then quit after his junior year, only to un-quit to play for a rival school’s team as a senior. That’s pretty close to it.

    Oh, and suppose the rival school had never won anything. There you have it.

  8. Coon Dog

    Whoever wrote this story is fucking retarded. We want OUR quarterback to return. It’s none of YOUR business. Most packer fans are over the Favre thing but this site always talks about it. Move on man.
    WAR Viking Superbowl 2011!

  9. Hans Thorborg

    Hahaha! you pecker fans are always crying about Farve. If your so upset, send a letter to your stupid owner asking why he cut him. Noone to blame but yourselves. You should keep a calender to watch the days until our guy comes back to stomp the cheese.

    Skol Vikings!

  10. bitter, bitter fans. you guys whine about hating Favre as much as you think we whine about liking him. i thought the “train left the station”? why do any of you care about what happens to Favre? you’ve got your QB – everything worked out for your team.

    talk about obsessing…hypocrites. your turn…give it to me. i’d love for you anti-Favre fans to defend your attitude.

  11. TPS

    Brent: Hey Deanna, look here, a super duper fan Viking fan took out a full page ad urging me to come back!”

    Deanna: Oh Jeez Loueez! What are you going to do?

    Brent: Well now I’m fucked, I have to return. JUST LOOK AT THIS AD! FOR CHRIST SAKES THIS BENJAMIN GUY PUT ME IN A TIGHT SPOT!

  12. oh – for whoever’s gonna ask me, “if you’re a Viking fan, why are you on a Packer site,” good point. i search for hypocrisy and try and snuff it out. it’s my mission.

  13. 12meninthehuddle

    hey jeff, no-one is gonna ask you “if you’re a Viking fan, why are you on a Packer site,” because we don’t give a crap. It makes us laugh, that you need to troll a Packers site to get involved in some high brow sports talk. Although this does make sense given that being a “fair weather, mercenary, piece of crap” vikings ‘fan’ you most probably live in Minnesota where your idea of scintillating conversation comes from your weekly Court ordered domestic violence meeting. Oh and clearly you got confused during your post buddy. When you said “hypocrisy”, you meant “cock” and clearly when you said “snuff” you meant “suck”. hope this clears shit up for people………..

    Nothing personal jeff, i just really don’t like your kinda people.

  14. Coon Dog – you’re not in the jungle. No one cares about your WARs.

    Jeff, I’d like you to explain what you wrote earlier:

    ” you guys whine about hating Favre as much as you think we whine about liking him.”

    Read that again, slowly. Then explain it rationally and coherently. What does a Viking fan whining about liking Farve sound like?

    I hate being the grammar police, but you guys continue to prove us right. We call you idiots and all you do is respond with inexplicable misspellings and jaw dropping run on sentences. By the way, thank you for that golden piece of literature, Symon. Not one sentence. Perfection. Good luck finishing high school.

  15. jurgens – it’s a perfectly sane, coherent and grammatically correct sentence. if you don’t get it, it’s not worth explaining.

    your grammar police badge is hereby revoked.

  16. vikes2championship

    Im so glad that grammer involves being a football fan…try listening to most players in the NFL today…some of those guys i can barely understand and the way some talk you can tell they grew up rough and caught a great break. If all you can do Jurgens is tell people how they can’t spell then that proves your just trying to start something by telling viking fans how stupid we are. You just can’t seem to get over the fact that Brett Favre came to Minnesota and had one hell of a year. People can talk all they want about choking but the real thing that killed us was a 12 man on the field penalty that forced us to pass the ball. If not for that longwell (another former packer if you didn’t know) kicks the 51 yard field goal which he has made 3 times this year already and brings us to the super bowl. So i don’t blame favre. 6 fumbles in that game and we were still in it. Favre did an amazing job after the beating he took in that game. He will forever have my respect.

  17. Al Borland's Beard

    Forced you to pass the ball? Favre had an open space to run for at least five yards yet he made a mistake that most high school QB’s wouldn’t make. Make whatever excuses you want, but the man is a choker.

  18. Symon

    To matt
    i’ve had a qb do that but even when he stepped out on our homefield our fans cheered him on of course we won but evertime we hit him we helped him up just like brett did when donald driver got hit.

  19. Symon

    To Jerkins i mean Jergens

    im 17 and the only place i really wanna hear bitching about my grammer is in school k, and i will finish school because this 230 pound DE loves sacking naye sayers like Jared Allen loves sacking aaron rodgers.

  20. you know how Pack fans solely blame Favre for the 2007 NFC Champ loss to NY? i’ll support that take…if, by using their own logic, Packer fans solely blame AR for the Wildcard loss agin AZ this season. any takers?

    for the record, i would never blame AR solely for that loss, just as i wouldn’t blame Favre for the Giants loss.

  21. 12meninthehuddle

    Symon.

    you can’t even spell “grammar”. idiot. way to go and perpetrate a stereo type. why don’t ya pay more attention in class, just in case your “pro career” doesn’t pan out. Oh and your last little comment about Jared “fake red neck persona” Allen should have gone more like this “this 230 pound DE loves sacking nay sayers like Jared Allen loves racking up dem DUIs”

    Would have made the rest of us laugh more………

    (and i’m guessing that if you respond to this you will only take um-bridge w/ the fact that i insulted jared Allen)

  22. Jeff, you didn’t explain it. You said vikings fans whine about liking Brett Favre. To me, that sounds like Vikings fans are walking around complaining about the fact that they like Brett Favre. They’re super bummed out because they love him. is that what you were trying to say? If so, it’s weird.

    As for the 2007 NFC championship game, that was different than the Cardinals game this year. Actually, very different. Brett threw a shitty pass. Period. (Sort of like the one he threw against the Saints) Rodgers got nailed because of a missed blocking assignment. Most of us believe it should have been roughing the passer because of the helmet contact. On top of that, the play before featured an even more blatant helmet to helmet hit from Bertrand Berry. So, it’s not the same and most packer fans don’t blame Rodgers for the loss. he was the main reason we almost won.

  23. Oh lordy, Symon. I have nothing to say, your amazing prose says it all. Thank you.

    Jeff. Nice blog. Perhaps you could do us a service and throw up a few more banners, high resolution images, videos and crap music players so that it doesn’t load at all. The Vikings school of design is still churning out glue sniffers I see. It’s cool that you search for hypocrisy to snuff it out, sounds kinda hot. It’s clearly why you showed up on this Favre post.

    Let me explain how intelligent folks can hold two thoughts in their head simultaneously: Packers fans like the Packers. We also liked Brent. Then Brent pulled some shit because he was not treated like the diva he is, and got traded. The fact is that he could have been the starter but he didn’t like our coach or GM (or ‘owner’ for you Vikings fans). But he was mad we moved on after he retired for what seemed like the 10th time. He goes to the Jets and screws an entire franchise just so he can get to the Vikings, to screw the Packers (which he did, mind you). All along the way he lies about why he is coming back, talks trash about his two previous super bowl teams, Green Bay, and basically F’s the mouth of Packers Nation all along the way. Here is my point: We are Packers fans that can objectively call Lord Favre’s BS because we happen to be content area experts, not because we are bitter or sad. This site documents Favre’s great season and our position on this situation perfectly. Do your research. Let us know if you need further clarification.

    Coon Dog: Welcome back! Remember that time we made fun of everything you did until our sides split with laughter? That was awesome. Please comment frequently.

    Hans! Good to see you again. Still talking about the Packers owner I see. Well, as a community owned team with actual pedigree and history, it might be hard to understand that the Packers are the only non-profit, community-owned franchise in American professional sports. Sure we toot that horn a bit too much, but it is a little silly you don’t know this. We still love you and your lobotomy scars though.

    vikes2championship: a graduate of the Symon school of literature I see. Al Borlands Beard said it all.

  24. jeremy

    Ha ha ha I love it!

    “Get over it and worry about your own team!”
    Viqueens2chumpionship

    Do you go Troll Bears pages too since your so worried about your own team?

    Minnesota the land of half ass Championship-less Metroholes, or is it 10,000 lakes? Wait Wisconsin has more lakes than Minnesota. And in a few years more NFL franchises too.

  25. anita

    Dear jeff ircink: We Packer fans are quite well aware of Brett Favre’s charities. We’re the ones who padded their coffers for 16 seasons and made them what they are today. We’re the ones who stood by he and his wife’s sides during his father’s death, his wife’s illness, his brother-in-law’s death, and his time in rehab for addition to painkillers and alcohol. We’re the ones who purchased and put his wife’s breast cancer tome on the Best Sellers list. And we’re the ones that he ended up fucking over by whining his way onto a divisional rival’s roster. Contrary to what is floating around in the space between his ears, he isn’t screwing over Ted Thompson, for whom this is a JOB, but the FANS who supported him for years. So please, spare us the condescention and the assumption that we’re all swampwater hillbillies in orange hunting vests, swigging Leineys and grilling brats in the snow. You guys erected a tacky assed billboard the same week as the country was in full donation mode to help people that actually NEED the assistance and attention, but instead of donating to that, you wasted money to stroke the ego of an attention whore, giving him all the more reason to jack you all around this summer. Have fun, and perhaps stick to your own websites instead of trolling our’s. We already have a QB. Fifteen years younger, every bit as talented with a HELL of a lot more class, and if you delusional knobknockers think we’d trade that, you’re more ridiculous than that billboard already makes you look.

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